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How do you handle jealousy issues with a 3 1/2 yr old and 2 yr old?

The older kid (becca) and the younger one (lindsay) get along really good in public but as soon as they get back home, becca pushes lindsay, smacks her, anything physical. Becca gets disciplined after each and every time but she still does it. Please help. Anything is appreciated.

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mommysurprenant

Asked by mommysurprenant at 11:11 PM on Jul. 12, 2008 in Preschoolers (3-4)

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Answers (5)
  • Sounds like Becca is looking for any attention...even bad at this point, and your disciplining her is still getting her the attention she wants. She has learned real quick that this works. Try a little one on one with each (if possible)..this is becca's time...then...this is lindsay's time..then they have to play nice together and share or let becca know if she can't play nice then she will have to spend time by herself. Sounds cruel, but at one point I had to turn a bedroom door knob around backwards and lock one of my boys in, but it worked. Good luck. Sibling rivalry.
    s.c.a.r.l.e.t.

    Answer by s.c.a.r.l.e.t. at 11:25 PM on Jul. 12, 2008

  • I do the same as SCARLET- if my kids are fighting, I put them in their rooms to play alone, and set the timer. They usually end up having a great time and I hear them talking with their toys and using their imaginations.

    My husband wants me to put them in a time out chair, though.
    TXdanielly

    Answer by TXdanielly at 11:33 PM on Jul. 12, 2008

  • Seperating them and explain to the offending child that this is very unacceptable, you have to stay consistant with this in order for it to work. Its normal for sibilings to do this...Good Luck!!!
    Queenof8Bratz

    Answer by Queenof8Bratz at 1:02 AM on Jul. 13, 2008

  • I can totally relate. There are 10 mos between my 4 & 3 yr olds and 14 mos between my 3 & 2 yr olds. They will do anything (all at the same time) to get me to pay attention to them. I read to them seperately at bedtime so they can get some one on one time with me. I also give each one a choice of meal one day a week so they feel special. I try to do any little thing during the day seperately so they feel like mommy's little helper.
    jasonia4Cs

    Answer by jasonia4Cs at 7:02 PM on Jul. 14, 2008

  • I totally believe that they are competing for your attention. I have the same problem with my 3 year old daughter Celeste and 1 year old son Adrian Jr. What I do is try to set aside time for them to spend with me. Like when Adrian is taking a nap I read to Celeste or allow her to help me with making cookies or we draw together. And when Celeste is taking a nap Adrian and I do things together that interest him. It wouldn't hurt for you to get on the floor and play a game with them or color or something that will show them that you can all get along by sharing equal time together.
    ShellyChacon

    Answer by ShellyChacon at 10:36 PM on Jul. 18, 2008

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