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Why do you have to act like BLEEP all the time? is a BLEEP your comlexion, or is it all in your mind?

okay, so there's a question that's been stirring in my mind...i'm a black woman, proud of it, sport a nappy/natural head of hair, i love my dark skin/brown eyes...and all that...but, the artist Common featuring Mos Def asked this question on his 'like water for chocolcate' cd:
'why you gotta act like a nigga all the time?
is a nigga yo' complexion, or is it all in ya' mind?'

why are there some of 'us' who think it's cute or an 'okay' part of our culture to be loud for NO REASON, mean for NO REASON, 'in yo' face and i dare to even blink' making those around them uncomfortable for, YEP, YOU GUESSED IT...NO FRIGGIN' REASON?

okay, i get the whole racial/being held back/oppression thing....really, i do! i dig Angela Davis/Marcus Garvey/Malcolm 'El Hajj Malik El-Shabazz' X/Nikki Giovanni and all them, but REALLY...some black folks get so testy when they see a 'mixed' couple...WHY? some black people get soooo very testy when people of other ethnicities DON'T want them 'around' because for some strange reason, we seem to think that we can make life miserable for others (i guess) because we ourselves are miserable...but when will it end? don't you (for those who are going to get an attitude because i just may be talking about them, sorry...i mean no disrespect, i really am curious about this) think you're going to get tired of always fighting and NOT getting along with your/our fellow brother and sister of the human race?

i feel the pain of stares and comments when people see me and my 3 kids...they assume i'm a child myself (i'm 31) because God has blessed me with a youthful look. people see 2 of my 3 kids and assume that i'm not the birth mom, not thinking that maybe their father is of another race (which by the by, HE IS...HE'S MEXICAN), just curious...if someone can clarify why some of us 'black folk' act like niggas but then get mad when people don't want us around, i would trully appreciate it!

Answer Question

Asked by HappyHmsklNapps at 7:04 AM on Jul. 2, 2011 in Politics & Current Events

Level 19 (7,634 Credits)
Answers (17)
  • You make a great observation that I'm sure many people would like the answer to. I'm white, so I cant speak from your perspective as a woman of color. But I can speak to you as a woman who has been thru some similar situations. I too have been blessed w/ youthful genes, & had the stares of judging strangers when my boys were little. But I learned to hold my head high & not care what others thought of me. They dont know me. We may never understand why some people are ok w/ certain unacceptable social behaviors, or why they object to inter racial couples. Sometimes it's just downright ignorance. Which brings me to my last point. The use of the N word. I hate it, It's an ugly word & wish EVERYONE would lay it to rest like they ceremoniously did in Detroit a few years ago. I hope you find the ans. you are looking for. Or at least the strength to move past the negativity.


    Answer by mrsmom110 at 7:13 AM on Jul. 2, 2011

  • so true- not all African Americans BUT too many of them have a chip on their shoulder, they are a very interesting people. i think that the ones who act ghetto gives the whole race a bad name. it is such a shame how they demean their women in their music. i have never heard any italian or native american, white , asian or pacific islander men make music and call their precious women bitches and hoes. ONLY BLACK men call their women such nasty names in their music. Another thing that gets to me about them is that they like pulling out the race card every time things don't go their way- very pathetic indeed!!! it reminds me of a naughty, pouting child. they can dish out the dirt but they can't take - for instance black comedians make fun of whites all the time. from the way they talk, their dance, etc-BUT let a white make the same joke about a black.....Al Sharpton and Jesse Jackson will be at your door step.

    Answer by gwen20 at 7:22 AM on Jul. 2, 2011

  • Another thing is they are usually always the loudest ones out in public. if i am out at a restaurant it is normal to hear people chattering of course- but the table with the blacks will be the loudest ! if i am waiting in line at the store, the blacks will be the loudest.. i could go on and on. i don't know if they think they have something to prove in public but it is just so immature. i have made an interesting observation - THE blacks who immigrated from Africa and or the Caribbean DO NOT ACT like the African Americans. i think they are more cultured, they are not loud, they have a lot of pride, and they hold them selves to a different standard. has anyone else noticed that about foreign blacks or is it just me?

    Answer by gwen20 at 7:30 AM on Jul. 2, 2011

  • I really like your post. It's very honest and well thought out. I don't like when anyone acts like a stereotype. I'm white and I can't stand some people around me acting like rednecks. I mean rude, obnoxious, ignorant, redneck. Sorry I don't like that and I don't want to be around them. I got friends of all different races. It infuriates me the ignorance of some people. I seem to live in racist alley. "why you hanging out with that "N"" grrrr.

    Answer by Cenedra64 at 7:30 AM on Jul. 2, 2011

  • @gwen20....I SOOOOOOO AGREE WITH EVERYTHING YOU SAID! well stated hun! @Cenedra64...thanks darlin'!

    Comment by HappyHmsklNapps (original poster) at 8:48 AM on Jul. 2, 2011

  • Defense mechanism???


    Answer by skittles1108 at 8:55 AM on Jul. 2, 2011

  • Preach it! Yes gwen I have noticed that too.Certainly not all black folks are that way but yes many are.Differences can be a very good and interesting thing.I grew up with other whites and blacks up north.Most of my black friends were loud lol and we joked alot with each other which I think was great.These days it seems if you joke like that omg here come the PC police! Thats bs.Why ruin what seems to be a good thing? Where whites and blacks are getting along and having fun? Not everything is so damn serious.I understand what some are saying about the chip on the shoulder too..some blacks go around acting like all us whites owe them.That usually comes from the adults they have been around.Kudos to you OP for bringing up a touchy sub ..if a white mama brought this up shed likely have been hammered for it by the pc police.

    Answer by tnmomofive at 9:13 AM on Jul. 2, 2011

  • By the way I also do not care for the music you speak of gwen where women are called bitches..ho's and such.It's no wonder that alot of black women will beat their black sig other down with that mess playing lol.

    Answer by tnmomofive at 9:30 AM on Jul. 2, 2011

  • My son's best friend in high school..and still is his best friend now that they are adults with their own families and black and he has a law degree, practices in Atlanta, is extremelty intelligent ( he was a candidtae for a National Merit Scholarship) married a lovely white woman and he does NOT like that kind of music. He likes U2 and Live, for instance, and doesn't fit into the stereotypical black man slot. He respects his wife, his Mother and all women. I think it is due to his education and his intelligence and the way he was raised. My son and all of his friends are of many heritages, races and religions. None of them fit into a "slot" or a stereotypical image. We don't like music that demeans any woman. Or language that demeans anyone.

    Answer by minnesotanice at 10:17 AM on Jul. 2, 2011

  • I know several ppl who falls in the catagory you are talking about. It is sad because it gives ppl something negative to talk about when it comes to our race.
    You know another thing that bothers me is with some of my family members, I get that I am trying to act "white"
    how? I speak proper, my kids are involved in all kind of activites, I have white friends, spanish speaking friends, all kinds of races. I am not loud or angry, and I don't hang around negative drama. How does that make me "white"
    I hate when ppl say that because it demeans our race and it's say that when are worthless and ghetto which is FAR from the truth. I have met loud ghetto ppl in all races. sorry I just had to vent.....but it makes me mad. I love being African American. Love my complexion and how beautiful our race is and all the shades of brown, But I agree it makes me mad when ppl act the way you describe

    Answer by kyheavensmom at 11:04 AM on Jul. 2, 2011

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