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I think I hate my dd...

I know it sounds really f*ed up to say, but I think I do hate her. She is a brat. She no longer listens to me (but is good for everyone else) and does whatever possible to piss me off (she is 4 1/2). I tell her a million times a day not to do something and she still does it. And it isn't like the rules are new, they have been in place since the beginning. I hate being at home with her. When she comes into the room where I am at, I instantly get in a bad mood. It is so bad that I have told my husband that either she goes or I go. He won't give me an answer. He is at work right now and I am packing up my bags. I feel horrible for feeling like this. She used to be my reason for living. I don't know if the reason I am feeling like this is PPD and Grief (I had a baby a few months ago that passed away). I am taking my antidepressant as prescribed, so it shouldn't be PPD or anything. I am also having suicidal thoughts and the way I have been feeling towards my dd only makes it worse because I know she (and my hubby) would be better off if I was dead. I don't know how to start loving my dd again, I have so much resentment towards her.

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 4:19 PM on Jul. 2, 2011 in Preschoolers (3-4)

Answers (29)
  • Are you recieving any kind of counseling along with your anti-depressants? The meds are a temporary 'bandaid' you still need to treat the problem to get everything under control. Perhaps have DH take few days off to keep DD while you stay with a friend for a break and then start counseling ASAP.
    But_Mommie

    Answer by But_Mommie at 4:21 PM on Jul. 2, 2011

  • You should pack 3 days of clothes and voluntarily commit yourself. It sounds like you have bigger problems and a resentment towards her because she lived.
    gemgem

    Answer by gemgem at 4:22 PM on Jul. 2, 2011

  • Yes, I am receiving therapy and going through an outpatient program 3 days a week.
    Anonymous

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 4:23 PM on Jul. 2, 2011

  • I can see why it is posted Annon...

    In the spirit this might be a real post and not trolling to stir drama, and just prevent others from seeing your name and stalking you for hating your kid...

    Loss will get you more confused and emotional... ~*Hugs*~ and try to get your support system to step up and help out? Friends and family need to help by taking her off your hands, you getting a break, and grieving! ~*Hugs*~
    MommaClark3

    Answer by MommaClark3 at 4:25 PM on Jul. 2, 2011

  • Well I suggest you call your therapist now. You need this to not get out of hand and they will know what you need to do next. They may suggest a voluntary in patient stay but if they is what you need to balance things out right now then that is what you should do. Please call you therapist.
    But_Mommie

    Answer by But_Mommie at 4:26 PM on Jul. 2, 2011

  • mommaclark3, this isn't a fake post...I just got out of the hospital on June 1 after a 5 day "voluntary" stay (my therapist gave me an ultimatum to either go voluntarily or she would call the cops and have me taken in), that is how I came to start the outpatient program. I emailed my therapist last night and she hasn't gotten back to me and don't know if she will being a holiday weekend.
    Anonymous

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 4:29 PM on Jul. 2, 2011

  • I can tell this is a real post. I am so sorry mama. You are a good mom and good person and they would NOT be better off without you. Your emotions are in turmoil and so are your DD's. You might consider family counseling/therapy.
    ohbladi

    Answer by ohbladi at 4:32 PM on Jul. 2, 2011

  • Just go ahead and have DH drive you to the facility. Let your therapist know you are going so she is aware of the situation. Does she not have a phone number? Does the office not give and emergency number to call? This is nothing to ignore. If you are feeling suicidal and having trouble coping with your DD you need to get somewhere safe where they can help you. I know you may not want to but I think in your situation it would be best.
    But_Mommie

    Answer by But_Mommie at 4:35 PM on Jul. 2, 2011

  • I hope you get help. This makes me so sad for your daughter.
    .MhacFoirfe.

    Answer by .MhacFoirfe. at 4:49 PM on Jul. 2, 2011

  • i'd go check into the facility.. it's not normal to be experiencing these feelings..

    as for her not listening to you, she's doing it out of wanting for attention.. there are programs available to help when you get back home for parenting tips and tricks to help get your children to better behave, but remember your child are what you teach them.. and if your child is feeling neglected emotionally, the more she'll act out..

    if you can call a family member to stay with your dd, even your husband have if you have to call the police to get a ride to the facility... in situations like this they are more than happy to help you out.. or even stay with your dd until your husband arrives if its that bad.
    xxhazeldovexx

    Answer by xxhazeldovexx at 4:49 PM on Jul. 2, 2011

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