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3 Bumps

Not talking to mother

My relationship with my mother is not the best...she is always calling me and leaving message for me to call her and I don't want to. I already know what the conversaton is going to be like (her: oh I just called to see what ya are doing...we just sitting up in the house....how is the baby(yell at one ofher other kids)...ok I'm going to go lay down). I don't want to hear any of that...honestly only thing I want to hear from her is "I can come out and help ya if you need some help" or kets have a big family picnic or something.

Her conversations are depressing to me and sometimes reminds me of how far she has fallen...please don't get me wrong she is my mother and I love her but I can't always be there for her (like I had to when I was younger) now I need help and support. She calls me like 3 times a day and I just ignore the calls cause I don't even want to pick up..the voicemails are the same generic msg she leaves. I have told her I'm in school and not always able to talk but I do see she has called. ....ugh

***response to questions below****

My mother would not come it I had a picnic. To the other question...dang lol but I have expressed to my mother how I seriously need help and her response is not helpful. she trys to switch it up and blame me for the problem. She may say "see thats what I mean if you were out here i could help you more". I know that is damn lie. I hate the city we are from and my mother is currently not in the best living situation. She can't drive out here because she never had gas $$ even if I offer she mentions how she has to do something with one of the other kids....There is always some reason she just can't help me and it's always my fault. I have tried asking her to move out here but she rather stay homeless where she at. I dont get it.

Suggestions???

Answer Question
 
Jazmineamomma

Asked by Jazmineamomma at 9:07 PM on Jul. 2, 2011 in Relationships

Level 18 (5,286 Credits)
Answers (4)
  • Why don't you plan the picnic and invite her.
    tootoobusy

    Answer by tootoobusy at 9:09 PM on Jul. 2, 2011

  • Oh! I know what you are talking about! My MIL sounds like your mom, except she calls me daily. She calls 2-11 times a day! I have been counting since the baby was born. I once had to help her through a drunk anxiety attack over the phone while she was in vacation in mexico. My mom is the helpful type who only calls when she wants to come over or wants us to come over. In my situation, I tell MIL all the time about the helpful things my mom does which makes her want to do them too. If you do not have that option, I would tell her, "Mom, would you mind coming over and watching the kid(s) while I do my homework or while I clean? It would help me out so much!" That way she can see your busy lifestyle. Maybe save some time for you and her to talk after everything is done. If she still doesn't get it...say it bluntly! Good luck to you! :)
    Gingerwheel

    Answer by Gingerwheel at 9:34 PM on Jul. 2, 2011

  • ugh my mom is always calling me to tell me how much fun she's having and all the things she is doing - but when it comes to comming over to visit, it's to far blah blah. i just hung up on her today since i have a hard time dealing with her party mode thing she is going through for the last few years.
    but she always takes me back and acts like nothings wrong, nope we never resolve the issues but weird how we keep plugging on and very irritating that she refuses to take any ownership of any fault on her part.
    odessie

    Answer by odessie at 10:11 PM on Jul. 2, 2011

  • ok wow I am not the only one with mother issues lol I swear I thought I was the only one with a "terrible" mother
    Jazmineamomma

    Comment by Jazmineamomma (original poster) at 10:22 PM on Jul. 2, 2011

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