Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Why does my three year old almost four year old like to be squished?????

my three, almost four year old was born with some problems. as a newborn she suffered a global eschemic event that resulted in brain damage. now she is in no way slow or unintelligent, but when she gets upset she goes into an almost uncontrolable tantrum. i have other kids so i know these are not your run of the mill tantrums. but when she wants to calm down she will come to me or her dad and say want quish. so we pick her up and squeeze her as tightly as we can and she will calm down. i am not sure i understand why squeezing her soooo tightly helps to clam her. anyone have any suggestions?????

Answer Question
 
4g4b

Asked by 4g4b at 6:03 PM on Jul. 3, 2011 in Preschoolers (3-4)

Level 13 (1,283 Credits)
Answers (12)
  • Its comforting
    My autistic son does this as well. It makes him feel safe and secure
    butterflyblue19

    Answer by butterflyblue19 at 6:05 PM on Jul. 3, 2011

  • Sensory Integration. ( Google it for articles) They like the way it feels.
    2autisticsmom

    Answer by 2autisticsmom at 6:09 PM on Jul. 3, 2011

  • but she ahs not been diagnosed as autistic or anything in there. the doc says maybe but she is too young being she is only three, she is worried she may grow out of the stuff she does, so they are wating til she starts school to see what happens. i am so confused.....
    4g4b

    Comment by 4g4b (original poster) at 6:12 PM on Jul. 3, 2011

  • Its not just autistic kids that want this. Does she have any developmental delays?

    butterflyblue19

    Answer by butterflyblue19 at 6:14 PM on Jul. 3, 2011

  • she is actually pretty much on par with all of her areas except for her social emotional responses and things, she does not like to look at you when she talks, she pretty much sticks to herself has since she was an infant. she was never really a play with me baby you know. if you left her to play alone she pretty much prefered it. and the littlest thing can upset her. and the upset is like zero to sixty in less than a minute. but she is really smart, remembers every person she ahs ever met. i mean down to people she met when she was an infant. she has a memeory better than mine it is scary sometimes. does any of that help??
    4g4b

    Comment by 4g4b (original poster) at 6:22 PM on Jul. 3, 2011

  • Still could be on the autism spectrum. All the kids act differently
    butterflyblue19

    Answer by butterflyblue19 at 6:25 PM on Jul. 3, 2011

  • She could just be very sensory. That doesn't mean autistic...but it could just mean touch and feelings play a big role in her life and emotions. I agree with everyone else that it probably helps her feel controlled and secure being "squished." Its a good thing that you have found something that helps her calm down during a tantrum. Many parents are still struggling with that. I wouldn't worry about it too much and once she gets a little older, hopefully they will be able to tell you exactly what her issues are...if there are any.
    Ash9724

    Answer by Ash9724 at 6:31 PM on Jul. 3, 2011

  • My son loves to be squished too. He has Sensory Processing Disorder (or Sensory Integration Disorder). You might read the book "The Out of Sync Child". It explains what SPD is, how it's diagnosed and how it's treated (mostly via Occupational Therapy). What I liked about the book is that it's clear that everyone has some sorts of sensory issues. It outlines the criteria to use to determine whether it's a problem or not. In your case, you child finds being squished to be very calming. If it doesn't get in her way or others, you don't need to do anything. You may find that some of her behaviors (i.e. the tantrums) are caused by sensory issues as well. It is not yet officially recognized as a stand-alone disorder (currently viewed as a component of other problems like autism and ADHD) so not all doctors will recognize it. Fortunately for us, mine did and sent us to a wonderful therapy center.
    momofryan07

    Answer by momofryan07 at 7:48 PM on Jul. 3, 2011

  • I used to care for a boy with ODD and it helped him out a lot to be squished as you say or arm/back massages. From what I understand that is common for kids with sensory disorders.
    luvmycutebaby

    Answer by luvmycutebaby at 8:11 PM on Jul. 3, 2011

  • It's very normal for children with sensory issues. Heck, even many newborns settle with swaddling. My son has autism and will ask me to roll him up in his blanket like a burrito (he's nine) It helps him relax.
    Queenie_Mab

    Answer by Queenie_Mab at 11:27 PM on Jul. 3, 2011

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.
close Join now to connect to
other members!
Connect with Facebook or Sign Up Using Email

Already Joined? LOG IN