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ok so i have this problem!!

I cannot go after sex he either comes after it or we dont do it!!! Sometimes I lay there and want it so bad but i wont do anything about it!! I have this fear that if he isnt comming after it and he isnt in the mood and would just be having sex with me because im comming for it... i dont want to have sex unless i know he wants it too!! So he has just stopped comming after it as often and wants me to start initating sex but im so scared i just dont want to look like an idiot if he isnt in the mood and doesnt want me!! is this weird am i wrong for feeling this way?? anyone else like this?? I just feel like if he wanted it he would come for it!!

Answer Question
 
scaredmommy08

Asked by scaredmommy08 at 11:33 PM on Dec. 15, 2008 in Relationships

Level 3 (16 Credits)
Answers (11)
  • I always feel like an idiot when I try to initiate it too. IDK I think for me it's a self esteem issue.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:36 PM on Dec. 15, 2008

  • If you want it, then ASK for it. Life's too short to worry about seeming like an idiot...and don't worry. You won't.
    gdiamante

    Answer by gdiamante at 11:41 PM on Dec. 15, 2008

  • If he is like most men, he will be totally turned on by you initiating. Very rarely will guys ever reject sex!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:45 PM on Dec. 15, 2008

  • Does he feel dumb when he initiates it, not knowing if you want it? Didn't think so. Men like when the woman takes control.
    Courtney508

    Answer by Courtney508 at 11:52 PM on Dec. 15, 2008

  • Just leave a can of whipped cream on his night stand. He'll get the idea!
    Tetona

    Answer by Tetona at 12:00 AM on Dec. 16, 2008

  • My guy is one of those rare rejecters :( and yes it does make you feel idiotic.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:15 AM on Dec. 16, 2008

  • Jump on it baby!!!! I love to initiate sex as often as possible!!! My fiance has NEVER turned me down!!! Most men wont, they like a take charge girl!!! Go for it!
    happyathomemum

    Answer by happyathomemum at 12:29 AM on Dec. 16, 2008

  • Go for it! Don't be afraid. Most men won't reject you, even if they are dead asleep. LOL. In your case, I really don't think you have to worry. He told you he WANTS you to initiate. He just wants to feel desired sometimes too.
    hopelessnance

    Answer by hopelessnance at 12:31 AM on Dec. 16, 2008

  • I feel the same way, and told my SO, and he told me it was a big turn on for me to initiate it! And told me that if I woke him up in the middle of the night to have sex, it would be an even bigger turn on, so just do it!!
    sunshineemommy

    Answer by sunshineemommy at 1:18 AM on Dec. 16, 2008

  • I had this problem with my hubby too. After I told him how I felt, he explained that he always wants to do. Period. Who knew? He wasn't asking because he thought I didn't want to do it. I would talk to your hubby out of the bedroom and see what he says.
    seelove

    Answer by seelove at 1:20 AM on Dec. 16, 2008

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