Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Terrible two's starting early?

My 15mth son has been throwing these awesome fits lately. Anytime he doesn't get his way, he runs to me, throws his arms around my legs, and just screams,stomps his feet, and cries. I understand he's upset b/c he can't communicate but how do I nicely peel him off me w/o him feeling like I'm ignoring his needs or condoning his wonderful new attitude? All i can think to do right now is ignore the tantrums when he doesn't run to me, time outs? or just keep patting him on the back and telling him he's all right and everything will be fine. I need some help fast before I start throwing MYSELF down and kicking my feet...LOL!

Answer Question
 
Jessimica

Asked by Jessimica at 4:49 AM on Dec. 16, 2008 in Toddlers (1-2)

Level 1 (0 Credits)
Answers (4)
  • I think what you are doing is ok , you just need to pull him gently off your legs and get down to his level and reassure him or explaine to him why he cant do what he wants to do . its tough but you will get there .
    loulou332

    Answer by loulou332 at 6:42 AM on Dec. 16, 2008

  • LOL... the last sentence just made me smile. that was so cute ;)

    Anyway. Ignoring is always good when he is doing that. He is in the phase where he will test you.. and it seems like he is testing very well. haha
    my daughter (17months old) has this phase since a couple weeks. if she doesnt get what she wants and is getting angry about it, then i just tell her: "listen honey, i love you very much. but if you are so angry and mean i will not talk to you!".. then i bring her in her room and let her play with her toys for a few minutes. she keeps crying and she will hit her toys on the floor and all that stuff. But after a few minutes she comes out of her room and smiles at me. then i tell her: "honey, i love your smile. now we can -talk- or play or whatever".. ;)

    works fine for me so far.
    m.robertson811

    Answer by m.robertson811 at 7:22 AM on Dec. 16, 2008

  • Right, toddlers tantrum because they lack emotional vocabulary. Ignoring the behavior is great, but also give the words to express himself. For ex, "I know you are mad you can have the ball. When you are ready to talk nice, we can play." And *then* ignore him until he's ready to relax. Use those words yourself too "I am sad to see you act this way. I'm very disappointed." Don't be afraid of "big words." Kids can develop much bigger vocabularies than most people give them credit for IF they are exposed to the words!

    Toddlers *will* get more than we give them credit for BUT they often lack that impulse control to keep their actions and emotions in check. Just be patient. Be consistent and don't let the tantrums sway you from your original stance.
    ldmrmom

    Answer by ldmrmom at 11:22 AM on Dec. 16, 2008

  • Thank you ladies for all your help...i've tried all of these and his tantrums have calmed down a little in length, he's still doing them quite a bit but he's not melting down like he used to! He has really responded to me getting down to his level and telling him "I know you're mad/upset b/c i took *insert random item here* but mommy had to take it away so *insert reason here*....would you like to go play with this instead? Ok you calm down and come talk to me when you do."
    Jessimica

    Answer by Jessimica at 2:26 AM on Dec. 19, 2008

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.