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I want to baptize my 18 month old daughter but the church is strict about godparents being married through the church. Is there any way around this?

My daughter is 18 months now and I haven't baptized her yet because we are having a problem finding a godmother. The church has become so strict because the godmother I am choosing (my SIL) was not married in the church. Any suggestions? (We are catholic)

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Asked by msp12r at 3:02 AM on Jul. 13, 2008 in Religion & Beliefs

Level 4 (57 Credits)
Answers (15)
  • I'm sorry, I don't understand why ? I would think whom ever you choose would be okay. Does it really matter in God's heart and eyes or is the church ruling the decision.

    Answer by bunco at 3:36 AM on Jul. 13, 2008

  • We had the same issue as you getting my son baptized in the Catholic Church. Basically we just explained that both the godparents were practicing Catholics that attended that specific church often. The priest was very nice about it but it was difficult to sway his decision. It didn't help that I am NOT Catholic either. But bring up the fact that the first priority is to have your child brought up into that religion and they will accept you. Good luck with everything!

    Answer by adeuslove07 at 4:22 AM on Jul. 13, 2008

  • I was able to get my son baptized in the Catholic church (did it to make my mom happy) and I don't even go to church, but since she was a member of the church and I had gone to school there the priest allowed it.

    Answer by sammiesmom2000 at 8:28 AM on Jul. 13, 2008

  • It's because marriage is a sacrament and she did not receive that sacrament in the church...She should be able to get the marriage blessed by the priest and that should take take of the issue (assuming she is willing to have it blessed). At this point the only other option is for you to pick a different Godmother if she is not or unwilling to get the marriage blessed. I know that it sucks, but he (the priest) is simply following Canon Law on this one.... One of the requirement is a Catholic in "good" standing.... failing to receive the marriage sacrament in the Church also means she can NOT receive communion, which also means that she not in good standing.... but if she was willing/able to get her marriage blessed by the priest that should take care of it. I can share with you what canon law that is if you want ....PM me....

    Answer by SAHMinIL at 9:41 AM on Jul. 13, 2008

  • i would have to say that you should pick a different church...i don't understand why they wouldn't baptize your daughter unless the godmother is married!...i baptized my daughter when she was 7months old and the godparents are my 16yr old sister and my husband's best friend...and neither one of them are married...

    Answer by JulieFrancesca at 1:12 PM on Jul. 13, 2008

  • I agree with JulieFrancesca. I had both my kids baptized in different catholic churches and out of the four godparents between the two of them only one was even catholic. The priests never even asked. The baptism is to wash away the original sin from your baby, not to check up on the marital status of the godparents. - JMO

    Answer by Gotoyourmoms at 2:03 PM on Jul. 13, 2008

  • That seems pretty lame to me. I'd find a different church to attend. How they can be so full of themselves I'll never know. I thought the only requirement of a godparent was they need to be the same religion as you. But whatever. Find a place that accepts your choice for godmother. Good Luck!!

    Answer by 2autisticsmom at 2:38 PM on Jul. 13, 2008

  • I would look for another church...not another religion just another Catholic church in the area.

    Answer by HeatherTurner at 2:39 PM on Jul. 13, 2008

  • CHange churches. Sorry but that's my opinion!

    Answer by TXdanielly at 11:29 PM on Jul. 13, 2008

  • Canon Law has more requirements then just being Catholic: The issue is not that the Godparents is married. (They can unmarried or married to different people) The issues is that she was NOT married within the Church. Marriage is a Sacrament, being married outside the church means she can no longer receive communion (according to canon law) and thus she is NO longer a Catholic in good standing (which is a requirement to be a Godparent).  More next post......

    Answer by SAHMinIL at 12:37 AM on Jul. 14, 2008

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