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For the women who've been cheated on and still love that man...

Why?? I dont understand how you could still be in love with someone who obviously didnt love you or respect you enough to not sleep with someone else. I dont so much mean the guys who messed up once and came clean and you've worked(or are working) through it. I mean the guys who have full on long term affairs and are emotional or in love with someone else. Weither you stayed, or left him, or he left you....why do women still love these men, when they obviously dont love her anymore?? Especially when the guy has moved on and started a new life with that other woman!!!


Asked by Anonymous at 10:53 AM on Jul. 5, 2011 in Relationships

This question is closed.
Answers (6)
  • Every marriage or relationship is different. If a woman was cheated on, it doesnt mean he had a long term love affair, it could have been a one week thing, which has the same affect. I wouldnt judge unless you've personally walked in that persons shoes.

    Answer by Ashleigh_17 at 11:22 AM on Jul. 5, 2011

  • You have never been in these women's shoes.

    Answer by pookiekins34 at 11:06 AM on Jul. 5, 2011

  • for me, not so sure if its the mental abuse i went through... i AM with a GREAT man now though-- but i have those moments, where i am "in love" with my son's dad. i personally think its b/c no one else would want me, or i wouldnt be good enough for anyone else-- everything that he threw at me in the past, to break me... i definitely broke. its not so much hard to let HIM go- but its hard to let go of what you want... i'd love to have a relationship with my son's dad- be a "family"-- but i'm slowly working up my self worth into knowing that i'm worth WAY more than that POS. i'm slowly realizing that its not biology that makes a family. i have to let go of those hopes/dreams and form new ones-- something that is hard for me.

    Answer by Shy_Dia at 1:34 PM on Jul. 5, 2011

  • Have you been that woman?

    Answer by yesmaam at 10:58 AM on Jul. 5, 2011

  • I have been in those shoes. Cheated on and devestated. But I got over him, QUICK. I was very hurt and bitter at first, and it took time. I get that. But I got over it. I'm talking about a men who cheated, left their wife (or she left him), he moved on and is now with the "other" woman, and the ex is still in love with him and wont let go. Youre right...Ive never filled those shoes. I figure if a man doesnt want me anymore, I dont want him. And I dont understand how years later, the ex can still be hanging on to the tought of him coming back, or trying to create issues with him and the other woman. Why is it so hard to let it go and move on? I really just dont understand.

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 11:27 AM on Jul. 5, 2011

  • I can understand your question MUCH better now. I had one of my closer friends do this with a guy she'd only been seeing for 2 or 3 months. She made up a fake pregnancy, and.... She actually tricked herself into believing she was pregnant. She went to doctors for pregnancy tests more than once, made up cravings I could see it, all of our friends could see it, but she couldnt. Maybe that was her way of healing, but almost 9 months later, shes still not over it. Its kind of sad watching.
    Now when my husband messed up, he got it, still gets its..and were still trying to work through it. But, the girls who are like my dear friend, I have no idea whats going on with them.

    Answer by Ashleigh_17 at 7:47 PM on Jul. 5, 2011