Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

1 Bump

How to prove to my soon to be mil?

yes i am 19 and young but she is afraid that after i turn 21 im gona do what my df's ex did and that was go out every night and party while the kids and him were home. yes when i turn 21 i plan on going out to celebrate my birthday but im going to control what i drink and how much because i have kids to take care of. yes ill want to go out once and a while but not every night and i would like to go out with my df. how do i prove to her im mature enough and make her realize im like her ex daughter-in-law

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 4:48 PM on Jul. 5, 2011 in Just for Fun

Answers (10)
  • I think only time will do that. Good Luck!

    Answer by AF4life at 4:49 PM on Jul. 5, 2011

  • Prove her wrong but being a mature adult when you turn 21.

    Answer by pookiekins34 at 4:50 PM on Jul. 5, 2011

  • You don't. You should never spend your life "proving" yourself to anyone. You don't owe her anything. Focus on your marriage to her son and make that positive. Take the focus off of MIL.

    Answer by Ataemommy at 4:51 PM on Jul. 5, 2011

  • I am 22 years old and I think that sounds immature. I am not married but I do think that women who have children should not be going out and partying with their girlfriends whenever. I'm not saying you should stay home and be barefoot and pregnant all your years but I'm saying that once you become a mother, you should behave like a mother. That means having respect for yourself and making habits and behaviors that you want your children to follow. If you want to have a date night with your hubby while your children are with a responsible adult, why not. I just think that you sound too immature right now to be getting married or thinking about what you plan on doing when you turn 21. You are young and sometimes you can get yourself in too deep when in the party lifestyle. You don't have to prove anything to anyone, just yourself.

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:54 PM on Jul. 5, 2011

  • By your actions. Character is determined by what we do. You can not future trip to a situation you haven't experienced yet. It can be an easy trap to get into like anon said. The "party lifestyle" can get the best of intentions messed up. Good Luck.

    Answer by LeJane at 5:06 PM on Jul. 5, 2011

  • i say who cares what she thinks. ur gonna be married to her son..not her. i spent a lot of time worrying bout what family thought, on both sides...and now i wish i woulda just listened to my heart. do what u want. there is nothing wrong with goin out every once in a while. have date nites with ur hubby, that will keep both of u happy. good luck!!

    Answer by goofygalno1 at 5:07 PM on Jul. 5, 2011

  • Actions speak louder than words

    Answer by monshine2 at 5:08 PM on Jul. 5, 2011

  • Anon was a little harsh. I don't drink at home, ever. I do go out on Thursdays to my friends house and drink there without my DH. He never goes out, but he chooses not to. Don't go to clubs or bars without DH, that is asking for trouble. Go to a friends house. Ask MIL to go with you on 21 birthday. Behave yourself and you will get respect.

    Answer by cueballsmom at 5:08 PM on Jul. 5, 2011

  • You don't have to prove to her. It's not her business. Also, as someone who got married young (20)... I know from experience that you will probably go out way more than you realize or plan. I didn't think I went out that much but looking back, I was out way more than a young mother should have been. I went out about once every 2 weeks. Now that im in my 30s with another young one I realize what bad decision I made. Good luck!

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:48 PM on Jul. 5, 2011

  • You need to worry about your fiance & your kids, you don't have to prove nothing to your MIL, but if you insist in proving yourself to her then actions speak louder then words. GL!

    Answer by VanillaBlondie8 at 8:13 PM on Jul. 5, 2011

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.