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3 Bumps

How do you feel (simplified from my question the other day)

you are the park
your child is young (3-7)
there are six, seven kids playing together
one child (3.5) joins the group of kids
this child joins the circle of kids, starts to flap hands, turning in circles, looking at ceiling, moving head back and forth and making odd humming noises
(you do not know this child, you might see this child is showing all classic autism signs)

all the other six/seven kids now are doing exactly the same thing as the child who just joined the circle of children, all kids are laughing and having fun
(they are not being rude, disturbing others, no unsafe behavior etc etc etc)
just kids being kids
all kids are being nice, not mocking the new child, just think what she is doing is silly and they all copy this and laugh and are having fun

now all seven/eight kids are flapping hands, staring at the sky, moving head back and forth, making odd humming sounds, and turning around and around in circles

1st-do you see that this is classic autism stimming?
2nd - if you know this is autism trait...

what do you FEEL when you see your child acting in this autistic" way?

(the children are all very accepting of the child doing the classic autism thing- so no need to jump in and explain to be nice to your child, the child is not physically unable to play- no need to jump in because the new child will get hurt-there is no bad behavoir or dangerous play)

how do you feel to see your "typical/normal" child acting like they have autism?

 
fiatpax

Asked by fiatpax at 9:39 AM on Jul. 6, 2011 in Relationships

Level 46 (221,572 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (15)
  • Well, my ds (9) has autism, and I'm all too familiar with stimming. I now have a typical 3 year old, and he copies his brother quite often. I know he isn't making fun, he's just doing what his big brother is doing! If we went to the park when ds was 3 and the other kids mimicked him, as long as no one was being mean or making fun I would probably laugh and be happy they were all having fun and including him (many experiences with parents pulling their children away or children just moving away :o( ) I see no harm in their behavior.
    Austinsmom35

    Answer by Austinsmom35 at 4:46 PM on Jul. 6, 2011

  • The question you need to ask yourself is does my child have autism? Just because she is mimicking another child doesn't mean she is autistic. My daughter picks at stickers, her car seat, flip flops. she is almost obsessed over it but I wouldnt say she autistic because of it.
    Mom1127-0125

    Answer by Mom1127-0125 at 9:46 AM on Jul. 6, 2011

  • Mom2-3girlz brings up a good point. People might be afraid their kids mimicking your LO might upset you or her. Never thought about it from that angle before.
    SleepingBeautee

    Answer by SleepingBeautee at 10:21 AM on Jul. 6, 2011

  • Honestly, when my kids were that young I didn't know enough about Autism to know that those were signs - my brother has mild Autism/Asperger's but he wasn't diagnosed with this until a few years ago (for the first 7 years of his life we were just told he had brain damage from drugs his parents gave him and he was a foster child so my parents we stuck following what the state mandated). If my child had been one of those in your scenario, I would have watched cautiously to make sure no one got hurt, but I would not have panicked.

    scout_mom

    Answer by scout_mom at 9:45 AM on Jul. 6, 2011

  • I would stop my child from imitating the behavior. I would know that my child wasn't TRYING to be mean or poke fun, because at 5 I don't think she really understands how that could be interpreted by the child or the child's parent. I would encourage her to play with all the kids, but to stop imitating.
    Mom-2-3-Girlz

    Answer by Mom-2-3-Girlz at 10:14 AM on Jul. 6, 2011

  • I probably would have recognized the stimming behavior and thought it was cute the other kids were doing it to. I wouldn't have been worried that my kids could catch it. Little kids are great, they find friends everywhere.
    SleepingBeautee

    Answer by SleepingBeautee at 10:15 AM on Jul. 6, 2011

  • I'll bet they thought you would think they were making fun of her. I wouldn't rule out that at least one figured the stimming was disturbing and didn't want their kid acting that way. From what I've experienced with my own son with autism,unless the other parent had a child/knew a child with autism,they act like it will rub off on their kid unfortunately. i can remember this past school year meeting the parents of one of my son's friends and look of horror on their faces when they realized their kids was friends with my autistic son....

    butterflyblue19

    Answer by butterflyblue19 at 11:19 AM on Jul. 6, 2011

  • I think your question is a little odd. It's just kids being kids. They don't know there is something wrong with that other child. I'm not quit sure why you are asking this question.
    Mom1127-0125

    Answer by Mom1127-0125 at 9:42 AM on Jul. 6, 2011

  • asked the other day
    but this took place in a library
    and it turned into a question about library rudeness and rules
    it is not about childs being rude, or disturbing others
    the kids are having fun
    it is a question of how do you feel seeing your healthy child behave as though they have autism
    what you do feel seeing (even for a moment) how it would be if your child was not ACTING autistic, does this cross your mind - i am guessing, if you know this is classic autism trait - how could it not cross your mind, if you see your child doing these behaviors
    fiatpax

    Comment by fiatpax (original poster) at 9:42 AM on Jul. 6, 2011

  • I think your question is a little odd. It's just kids being kids. They don't know there is something wrong with that other child. I'm not quit sure why you are asking this question.
    =======
    asking because it happened to me
    lots of people know nothing baout autism, or very little
    BUT
    i think most moms would recognize classic autism traits when child is doing all at the same time, then all other kids start to do this same behavoir

    fiatpax

    Comment by fiatpax (original poster) at 9:48 AM on Jul. 6, 2011

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