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What would you do if you found out someone was cheating on someone you know do you tell that person or do you let them find out on their own?

I happened to find out that someone very dear to me is getting cheated on but if I tell it will crush him and she is actually a friend of mine as well. So what would you girls do?

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ky_phoenix

Asked by ky_phoenix at 8:05 AM on Jul. 7, 2011 in Relationships

Level 11 (550 Credits)
Answers (20)
  • in my experience, they will just end of hating you for it and not even believe it
    SabrenaLeigh

    Answer by SabrenaLeigh at 8:15 AM on Jul. 7, 2011

  • If they are married and if you have absolute proof, then I would tell.
    NannyB.

    Answer by NannyB. at 8:15 AM on Jul. 7, 2011

  • such a hard position to be in.. I would want someone to tell me, but there is the saying "Don't kill the messenger" because most messengers get "killed"
    Maybe try a "if you knew a friend was being cheated on, would you tell them?" and see what he says. maybe that can be your answer. But Do you have any proof? Or just speculation? Because if you're wrong, then you would def lose the friend.
    cassie_kellison

    Answer by cassie_kellison at 8:16 AM on Jul. 7, 2011

  • If there is absolute proof you can show, then yes. I would appreciate my friend telling me. Hopefully your friendship is strong enough to endure the issues that will come of it all. Good luck mama!!
    Dahis

    Answer by Dahis at 8:24 AM on Jul. 7, 2011

  • If you are positive that it's true and than the person should know about and the person doing it deserves to get caught! Go for it, honesty is the best policy .... spill it ... but be kind in delivering the message!
    isismoon3

    Answer by isismoon3 at 8:26 AM on Jul. 7, 2011

  • It would depend on my relationship. I would likely give the cheater the chance to tell first.
    tspillane

    Answer by tspillane at 8:27 AM on Jul. 7, 2011

  • i would pressure the cheater to tell
    zoejains_momma

    Answer by zoejains_momma at 8:31 AM on Jul. 7, 2011

  • i was put in the horrible situation by my brother and his ex wife. I didn't have absolute proof that he was cheating, but when people are calling me telling me he was here and there with this chick, that was not his wife. I confronted him and told him that he needed to get his isht together because if I kept having to hear about it I would tell her. Because I told him that I would want someone to tell me. But he wasn't being very discreet and got caught on his own.

    Thank goodness b/c I didn't want to wreck the relationship I have with my brother (such as it is) but I would want someome to tell me, so I am not the only one looking stupid.
    Bubbie0809

    Answer by Bubbie0809 at 8:33 AM on Jul. 7, 2011

  • Yea, I have texts that she has been sending me about the guy and yep the couple is married. But I don't want to get in the situation of like you said kll the messenger either. But I also don't feel right that I know this and she is treating him...but she is a only 22 has 2 kids with him and he works all the time so she is feeling left alone with them...so depression is huge factor I know still it is not right. So I am so torn about this.
    ky_phoenix

    Comment by ky_phoenix (original poster) at 8:34 AM on Jul. 7, 2011

  • See I think if it were me I would want to know but at the same time I wouldn't because of my son, you know? My hubs grew up never knowing his dad and I couldn't do that to my kid. And I couldn't take my kid away from my husband. He is like air to that man. That is how those kids are to my friend and he lives to get home everyday and play with them. I was hoping she would stop being stupid and realize she has a pretty good man there...UGH!
    ky_phoenix

    Comment by ky_phoenix (original poster) at 8:42 AM on Jul. 7, 2011

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