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My 5 year old has been going through my wallet and taking my money he says he wants to buy something should I be mad

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Asked by keimom at 5:18 PM on Jul. 7, 2011 in School-Age Kids (5-8)

Level 6 (115 Credits)
Answers (7)
  • nah, just help him to understand that taking things isn't nice and asking or earning is a much better way to go about it

    Answer by zoejains_momma at 5:19 PM on Jul. 7, 2011

  • Not mad, but I would be concerned. Why does he feel he has to take it rather than simply ask you for what he needs or wants? My policy with children is always to look past the behavior to try and learn what prompted the behavior. That's what I would be concerned about in this case.

    Answer by NannyB. at 5:31 PM on Jul. 7, 2011

  • I would be angry but that is just me, I don't appreciate being stolen from by my children or anyone else for that matter. I would punish him before the theif steals from someone else.

    Answer by bcauseimthemom at 5:36 PM on Jul. 7, 2011

  • He gets whatever he wants he is just obsessed with money

    Comment by keimom (original poster) at 5:46 PM on Jul. 7, 2011

  • Does he have money of his own? I agree that behavior is always a signal (or symptom, or communication of something.) Generally, sneaking behaviors indicate fear of some sort--even just a feeling of "this is the only way I can make sure I get what I need/want" or "I have to do this to make it happen." Lying, sneaking, and hiding all indicate fearfulness on the child's part, like he can't afford to be open because he might not get what he needs. The need to control is the same sort of thing and is also fear-based (that's WHY they sneak, lie, or hide.)
    When I have been faced with fear-based behaviors in a child, I've responded by addressing that fear as THE issue. (I view the behavior as a sign or signal of an underlying problem, not as a problem to address in itself.) The behaviors always resolve.
    Generally, you could look to issues of control (areas where you may be controlling of him or he feels unheard/disregarded.)

    Answer by girlwithC at 8:40 PM on Jul. 7, 2011

  • shouldnt be mad but defently need tohave him understand that taking money with out asking is wrong that if he wants something all he needs to do is ask

    Answer by tjclore at 1:03 AM on Jul. 8, 2011

  • Have him earn money. There are piggy banks that read the about of coins put in it, and when it gets up to set amount "cash it in" and he can spend it. Earn the money. Also may want to put your purse up where he cant reach it.

    Answer by baquick at 11:54 PM on Jul. 12, 2011

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