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Anyone else grieving this holiday season?

My mom died a little over a year and a half ago. Last year I just sort of avoided Christmas altogether. But I decided to rejoin the living this year and resume my annual celebration of Christmas. It sucks and I really just want it to be January already. Anybody want to commiserate with me?

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 7:36 PM on Dec. 16, 2008 in Relationships

Answers (9)
  • I'll join you. I've been unemployed for 9 months and i am the only income for my household. Sorry about your mom.

    Answer by PrttyMstng at 7:40 PM on Dec. 16, 2008

  • That's rough you guys. A lot of people don't feel good about the holidays for some reason or another. You have to choose to be happy. Happiness is a choice believe it or not. You need to make yourself see the good in things.

    Answer by lowencope at 7:55 PM on Dec. 16, 2008

  • my 16yo nephew died of cancer this spring, it will be my sister first christmas without him, we live in different states, but i hurt a little too, i didn't get to spend that much time with him and get to know him all that well
    i wont call her to share my greif becaus its got to be like infinately worse for her and i dont want to add to her pain

    Answer by bi-polarmommy at 8:02 PM on Dec. 16, 2008

  • lowencope, I know you mean well, and I agree with your statement, but I think you should know that it comes across as sort of a slap in the face. I am a happy person, and overall I feel blessed and grateful for everything that life has offered me. But that doesn't bring my mother back, and it doesn't make grief go away. Choosing to see the good doesn't make the hardships cease to exist. So to tell someone who is grieving that they should choose to be happy and choose to see the good in things is really kind of, well, kind of shitty.

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:10 PM on Dec. 16, 2008

  • I lost a baby is feb I was 13 weeks pregnant. This would have been his or her first christmas. My brother died 9 years ago but it still hurts not to have him with us. Other than that I am blessed I have a beautiful dd and another one that should be here anyday now. I am happy but still miss those who should be here but are not.

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:17 PM on Dec. 16, 2008

  • Yes I am grieving also. I miss my baby angel and wished that he was here with us. I lost him when he was 20 months old. and when I go to the store I see all kinds of things that I could get him. My aunt we just buried her this Sat. I wished that Jan will be as well

    Answer by my4loves3 at 8:34 PM on Dec. 16, 2008

  • I, too, wish it was January already. The holidays are a really tough time for me, as I lost my daughter 20 months ago. I'm so sorry about your mom. I haven't decorated, I haven't started shopping, no tree, no cookie baking, etc. PM me if you ever want to vent. I would say try to surround yourself with people who will try lifting you up, but I myself have avoided relationships of all kinds since I lost my baby girl...but this season I'm sort of planning on rekindling some of them.

    Answer by orangeorbie at 10:02 PM on Dec. 16, 2008

  • I understand withdrawal as a means of coping with grief, orangeorbie. I'm usually someone who screams my feelings from the mountaintops, but when it comes to real grief, I just want to hide away from the world. But I'm glad you're moving towards rejoining the world. Thanks for your reply, and lots of hugs and love to you. Merry Christmas.

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:14 PM on Dec. 16, 2008

  • And to you as well : )

    Answer by orangeorbie at 12:38 AM on Dec. 18, 2008

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