Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

2 Bumps

Housemate and her house guests dog...........

ok, here's the deal. I rent a basement from a woman in a house. One reason being is because there's more private than apartment houses and it's quieter. I have PTSD on top of other anxiety and medical issues.

Leaving the house can be horribly scary most of the time, but I'm getting better. Anyway, my housemate is getting medical treatment, so her friends are staying with her in rotation.
The fact that there are now strangers in the house that I have to deal with (granted not much) is already stressful, but it's been workable. I am doing all I can to help out and be patient since my housemate has a medical situation to deal with.

Now, here's the problem. The woman that arrived day before yesterday brought along a dog that I was not aware of, and as soon as they leave the house that dog yips and barks CONSTANTLY the entire time. Which so far has been at least 4 hours. From what I understand, they will be gone for about 4 hours everyday for I'm not sure how long.

I just can't take the barking. if they are home, you can't hear the dog. But when they are gone, the dog barks so much that music does not drown it out entirely, and it gets me so nervous that my hands shake for the rest of the day.
I'm not even going to get into the Marijuana smoking that has gone on that I smelled and one of the friends told me about. (it's legal here if you are medically oked, but you can get medically oked for it by having a sprained ankle. ) far as I know, that has stopped. at least in the house.

when we moved in, it was agreed that there would be no smoking of any kind. any pets we had when we moved in and were all agreed upon. It's not that I mind dogs, I love dogs! I just can't take all the barking.

so I did speak with the dog owner, and she seems at a loss because she didn't know her dog barked much. I suggested doggie day care, but she just laughed at that idea.

I looked up that doggie day care around here is about 20.00 a day for the least expensive package. I'm looking to charge out of our rent for the amount of time I'd have to be gone to avoid the barking, the cost of my transportation there and back (I use a handiapped ride service) and what it would have cost them for a day of doggie day care. Since that would avoid the issue for me, but far as I can tell they aren't willing to consider.

That's not even considering my anxiety and my time really.

I'd love to be able to just say, 'hey no problem' but I medically cannot. Since the stress is a toll on my medical situation as well.

any thoughts?


Asked by Anonymous at 10:45 PM on Jul. 7, 2011 in Relationships

This question is closed.
Answers (6)
  • sounds like they don't care about your feelings and they are drug users usually don't care about much... maybe you should look for another place to stay for peace of mind and to get away from the environment. just don't get worked up and give yourself a stomach ache. I'd get the hell out of there as soon as I can. look at the want ads and do your homework... do you have someone that may be able to help you look? maybe through a church you can find something.

    Answer by miamoma at 12:57 PM on Jul. 8, 2011

  • Sounds to me like you have a good idea. I HATE that you would have to leave your OWN home to get away from the dog. Other than that I think you're within your rights to charge the dog owner for your pain and suffering. How inconsiderate.

    Answer by Rosehawk at 11:30 PM on Jul. 7, 2011

  • when we moved in, it was agreed that there would be no smoking of any kind. any pets we had when we moved in and were all agreed upon.

    Was that agreement in writing? Is it stated in your lease? Have you spoken with your landlord? How can they be considered as "staying" with your sick landlord if they are gone for 4 hours at a time? I don't think you can "make" the dog owner pay you for your anxiety and inconvenience. As for your landlord, if all you have is a verbal agreement, you probably don't have a legal leg to stand on unfortunately. It might be time to look for another place to rent. Sorry. Good luck.

    Answer by popzaroo at 12:16 AM on Jul. 8, 2011

  • i am sorry you are going through a hard time & i understand- i have a Anxiety Disorder so, i know how certain noises make you feel like you are going to Lose It- but, i agree with popzaroo- unless all of this is in writing, i doubt very seriously if they are going to do the things that you want them to with the Dog- she probably doesn't realize how much he barks b/c you even said that while they are there; he doesn't bark- hopefully, they will figure something out so that you will be on the same page but, it doesn't sound like she is going to put her dog in Doggie Day Care b/c of your issues- if things continue, i would just save myself the Extra Anxiety & start looking for a new place- i hope things work out for you- lots of luck!


    Answer by daisyb at 12:57 AM on Jul. 8, 2011

    yes, it was all in writing. as for looking for a few place, our eyes are always kept open.

    trust me, I've much more of a leg to stand on then our housemate / landlady, and she needs us much more than we need her.

    all other things aside, this is a pretty good place for the most part. If we find a better location we'll move on. Everyonce in a while she tries to pull a stunt and does not listen to anyone. I feared this was one of those times and that she wouldn't do anything.
    As for charging her for the problems the situation was causing, if she's in a mode of not listening this was the only way to reach her in the past.
    Yes, I spoke with her, but all that were concerned were taking the attitude that they didn't believe the dog was acting this way, or I should put up and shut up.
    Since I had no intention of doing so, I was going to take out of the rent if I was forced to do so.

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 11:11 PM on Jul. 8, 2011

  • cont-
    turns out, they did do things to help the situation and so far it's working. I just told them that the dog did very well today, I heard her a few times bit it was NOTHING like before, and I probably only heard her because it was quiet.

    so whatever it was that they were doing, I asked them to keep doing it since it worked.

    So I'm breathing a sigh of relief and so far so good. I certainly had no interest in starting friction, but I wasn't going to do nothing or move if I didn't have to. :)

    Let's all hope it keeps going well!


    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 11:14 PM on Jul. 8, 2011