Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Who has three kids? How did you know you were ready for the third? adult content

I have two now (four and 20months). I am 34. I think I would like another but I would rather wait a bit for my body to heal. I have inflammatory bowel disease and pregnancy wrecks me. Had to go on Prednisone for entire 2nd pregnancy. I want a third but worried if it is the right thing to do. Extra pressure because I am nearing the dreaded "advanced maternal age".

Answer Question

Asked by linda_lou at 9:14 AM on Jul. 8, 2011 in General Parenting

Level 7 (160 Credits)
Answers (12)
  • Well i cant say i was ready for my 3rd she was a surpise baby. I understand your worries! Sometimes it just happens though or you plan on it you will feel it in your heart. Im 31 and now on my 4th pregnancy! I hope you figure it out :) good luck momma!

    Answer by Mrs_Harsh at 9:19 AM on Jul. 8, 2011

  • You just know. I think you may need to allow your body to heal some more before you try. Sounds like it takes a toll on you. You need to be good for baby to be good.

    Answer by pookiekins34 at 9:21 AM on Jul. 8, 2011

  • I have 3 kids and I never planned for any of them. For me I thought I was done with 2 and the next thing I knew I was pregnant with my 3rd. I was very surprised and at first had a hard time with it. Now looking back I would never change it, my baby is almost 10 and I love her to pieces. I think if you feel you aren't ready then I would wait a little longer. Good Luck!

    Answer by cornflakegirl3 at 9:40 AM on Jul. 8, 2011

  • I didn't just know with either of my pregnancies. Neither were accidental but I was always worried if it would be the right thing to do. I was scared both times that I wouldn't be able to handle it. I wonder how hard is the jump from 2 to 3. I know every family dynamic is different and every child is different but in your experiences... how much harder did number three make it? I would hate to miss out on another wonderful child simply because I waited too long.

    Comment by linda_lou (original poster) at 9:46 AM on Jul. 8, 2011

  • We were planning on a third but she came earlier than we were planning. I honestly do not think that going from 2 to 3 was that much harder. For me the hardest part was giving myself more time to get ready. It seems every time we add a baby I need to add 15 or so minutest to getting ready to go somewhere and we are never on time. The other hard part was with ours being so close together and our middle child still does not sleep through the night that I was extremely tired until our youngest was sleeping all night long. But I would do it over in a heartbeat. Our kids are now almost 2, 3 1/2 and 4 1/2 and we are planning number 4.

    Answer by JamieLK at 9:51 AM on Jul. 8, 2011

  • I would want to get it over with if you know you are going to want a third. I am there on my 4th. I am 28, I've wanted to be done by 30-31 and I just gave birth 4 weeks ago. I don't want to wait because I hate pregnancy and don't want it looming over my head. Plus, I have noticed each pregnancy getting harder with age.

    Answer by Mom-2-3-Girlz at 9:57 AM on Jul. 8, 2011

  • You know what you want for your family so that is what you should do... With that said 3 is very different than 2. There is always an odd one no matter how you try to mix it up. My oldest is 10yrs older than my little guy so it is a little easier to handle but when they are close it can be hard. Think Carnival rides and such, if mom ride with one and dad rides with one, who rides with the 3rd? Yes, these are little things but they carry over to who sits next to who at dinner, at the movies, etc.

    I would not change my life at all. Always wanted 3 and I am so glad to have them!!

    Answer by sipn_mom at 10:02 AM on Jul. 8, 2011

  • You have a lot more stresses with a second than a third. With a second you worry about balancing things, how the other kid will react, and just everything really. With the third you already know the balance comes naturally as does everything else.

    Answer by pookiekins34 at 10:11 AM on Jul. 8, 2011

  • In my case, hubs and I decided we would have 2 kids. My 3rd pregnancy was an 'oops'....unfortunately that ended in loss. After the loss hubs and I talked and we both decided that we did want to have a 3rd child and then our family would be complete. On my 36th birthday our 3rd son was born. (yes he IS the last there won't be any more).
    For me going from 2 to 3 was not that hard, my older ones were 9 and 7 when #3 was born, so they were old enough to be helpers and also independent and able to do some things themselves (like pour their own glass of milk, use the potty). They were also in school, so that gave me some time during the day with baby, and then at night I was able to have time with the older kids.

    Answer by MizLee at 10:41 AM on Jul. 8, 2011

  • I have 5 kids. I really didn't get a chance to think about it when we added #3. When she was born my older kids were 13 months and 28 months. Those first years are all kind of a blur now. They are 11, 9 1/2 and 8 1/2 now. Since then we added 2 more. They are 5 and almost 1 (next week) now.
    Going from 2 to 3 was easy for me because I never got out of "baby mode". There was just always another baby to fill the spot. I was so used to sleepless nights and diapers (3 in diapers for 8 months in fact) and bottles and stuff like that. Going from 3 to 4 sucked because by that time the youngest was 3 1/2 and I had gotten used to 3 independent toddlers (although the youngest was still in diapers). Adding #5 was a breeze though because I had 4 older kids to help with him. Much easier to deal with a baby when you have 6 people to take care of him instead of 1 or 2.

    Answer by justanotherjen at 3:56 PM on Jul. 8, 2011

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.