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For SAHM's a quick question

DO you think because you are staying at home and not making an income you have no say in what the money is spent in your home or do you believe that taking care of your kids and home gives you a say in the household spending.

In my situation i am going to be a SAHM because going back to work i would only be making enough to pay for day care (along with 300 from my husbands check) on top of that i would have to buy another car because my husband would be using our car to drive for his job.

I was wondering because my MIL has now told me that since my husband makes the money i can kiss anything i want goodbye because i'll never see another penny (her words not my husbands)

Answer Question

Asked by krissii at 2:30 PM on Jul. 8, 2011 in Parenting Debate

Level 15 (2,127 Credits)
Answers (4)
  • I am a sahm and my dh never sees the money after he puts it in the bank. I am in charge of all the household spending. If the kids or I need or even want something, I know the budget and if we can afford it. Dh usually gets an "allowance" for things that he wants. If he was in charge of the money we wouldn't have any, lol.
    My mil on the other hand is a sahm mom and knows nothing about their money. If we are out shopping and she wants to buy something she calls and will ask my fil if she can get it. Sometimes he says no, not right now but for the most part he says yes. I don't think that I could handle calling for permission and not just knowing.
    I would say it depends on your and dh's relationship. This is definitely something that you should work out before you are officially staying home. If you both know what is expected then it shouldn't become an issue. Also, this is between you and your dh, not you and your mil.

    Answer by JamieLK at 2:39 PM on Jul. 8, 2011

  • what if the tables were turned and DH was a stay at home dad;you were the bread winner should he go w/out b/c he is taking care of his child? This is what she is saying to you,for caring for your child be grateful for a home and food

    Answer by RobinChristine at 11:58 PM on Jul. 10, 2011

  • We made that point to her she just steamrolled over us i don't know why i am surprised when i first lost my job she told me to kiss my car goodbye because now that's his (i had my 2008 eclipse before we got married and almost paid it all the way off before i lost my job) it didn't matter that i was getting unemployment and it covered half our bills oh well gotta love a overbearing MIL

    Comment by krissii (original poster) at 12:31 AM on Jul. 11, 2011

  • my husbands philosophy is what he makes is his and what I make if anything is his also which I don't agree with but if I say anything different he gets all pissy with me and starts screaming and throwing things and saying things to me that are unnecessary. For instance we had a sale this past weekend I sold several things of mine and the boys but when I was going to divide up the money husband says to me in a nasty voice "what are you doing a with that money?" so instead of starting something I just threw the money on the counter and walked away it is this way all the time around here. I feel it should be fifty fifty and everything should be divided equally when you are married no matter if one of you works or both of you works. I have no say so in money decisions and never have. I haven't actually had any money in my wallet in more then 5 years and it sucks; but I can't work because of medical issues and he knows this

    Answer by Christmaslver68 at 11:04 AM on Jul. 17, 2011

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