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How to deal with my husband and childs bio father?

My husband adores my daughter and provides a good home for her. He has no interest in meeting her bio father. Her bio father doesnt, work and he doesnt help with little else. He sees her everyother weekend, but my husband doesnt really agree with that. My daughter is 3 and I dont like when she goes to see her dad either because he hangs out with bad people and she always comes back angry an d emotional. But I feel its his right to see her because its her dad. My husband says different. we sometimes argue about it but it just eats at me of whats right.

Answer Question
 
jbeth13

Asked by jbeth13 at 1:44 PM on Jul. 9, 2011 in General Parenting

Level 1 (3 Credits)
Answers (6)
  • Bio fathers have rights too, step dad should understand this......if you can prove that where he takes her is dangerous, then tell the court and petition the change.
    older

    Answer by older at 1:48 PM on Jul. 9, 2011

  • If my ex hung out with losers and my kid comes home angry and emotional I would do what is best for my child and stop the visits. And that is what I did.
    emmyandlisa

    Answer by emmyandlisa at 1:48 PM on Jul. 9, 2011

  • I know you may feel bad but her bio father needs to grow up and take some real responsibility! Until he gets a job, and helps out with her like he should, he shouldn't have ANY right to see her! Do you have a court established custody agreement? If not, you have NO obligation to send your DD with him! Especially if you KNOW he's hanging around bad people! How can you really trust him to not have her around those "bad" people, you can't! Make him man up & help with her, or tell him how it's going to be!!! Just because you have a child doesn't mean you DESERVE to be a part of the childs life in most cases, he has to EARN that right to see her!
    something_

    Answer by something_ at 1:50 PM on Jul. 9, 2011

  • do you have a court order with visitation rights? If so there is nothing you or the stepdad can do. If you really feel that she is in danger, like older said, petition the courts. When your husband entered your lives he knew he would be the step and when it comes to arguments simply say this is what the court decided.


    IF you do not have a court ordered maybe you can work out a supervision right but i will warn you if you do not give him some kind of visits that you both agree upon, he can take you to court and get more time with your daughter.
    vntNyll

    Answer by vntNyll at 2:11 PM on Jul. 9, 2011

  • Is this COed visitation? If it was and he was hanging out with "bad people" as you say, I would get it adjusted if not, I would limit it to when he can have only appropriate people are her. I think if her step dad is providing for her, he should have a say, at least between the two of you.
    JLS2388

    Answer by JLS2388 at 3:54 PM on Jul. 9, 2011

  • Step dad has no right to say anything. Whether the father is paying or not, you can decide that you want to strip him of his visits. If you can PROVE he is around "bad" people then take it to the court.
    matthewscandi

    Answer by matthewscandi at 4:50 PM on Jul. 9, 2011

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