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Little worried and little hurt

My friend with the epilepsy was suppose to call us to get her from the hospital today. she was raped last night by her boyfriend. they been together roughly a week. the cop took her back home, she isnt responding to my calls or texts. She did post on fb that she didnt want to be bothered and those who commented on her status showing concern she told to f** off. I dont know if she is alone or not tonight. when i talked to her ealier she said that she didnt want to be alone and was looking forward to coming over to watch movies and de-stress. I have to wonder what happened with the cops today, its not like her to shut herself out. having been raped by a stranger 7 years ago myself I kinda know what she is going through. I just wish she would let me know if she is ok.
the guy isnt in jail yet, a friend had text a bit ago and seen him out walkin down town. I thought sure he would be in jail hours ago. my thoughts are not enough evidence or she dropped the charges. the only family he has is his dad and he cant afford to pay his bills let alone bond, and knowing his dad even if he did have the money he wouldnt bail him out.
what are your thoughts as to why the guy hasnt been arrested?

when i was raped the guy was arrested within minutes after I made the report, same cop talked to her today.


Asked by Anonymous at 11:27 PM on Jul. 9, 2011 in Relationships

This question is closed.
Answers (10)
  • You have a kind motherly spirit,hope it all works out.

    Answer by Sarah961 at 11:45 PM on Jul. 9, 2011

  • She may have dropped the charges or they are still gathering evidence. You can't worry about your friend. She is obviously in a bad spot right now. I mean, you warned her that he was a child molestor, she didn't listen and got raped. She is pissed. Just wait for her to reach out to you.

    Answer by emmyandlisa at 11:30 PM on Jul. 9, 2011

  • She most likly did not press charges or she is refusing to tell them what happen. Alot of women are afraid to give the details and as a ex cop that is the most frustrating thing to want to help someone who is just not ready to tell what happen. You should go talk to her. I would say she might be upset at first for being bothered but it will be for the best in the end. Good Luck

    Answer by gsae at 11:31 PM on Jul. 9, 2011

  • Either they haven't caught up to him or like you said there wasn't enough evidence or she dropped the charges. She could be upset about what happened with the cops or just upset in general about what happened and this is the way she is dealing with it.

    I was raped almost 4 years ago by my boyfriend and I never even told anyone about it and shut everyone out, so I also understand where she is coming from, but would also be worried about her safety because he is still out and about.

    I personally would go and check on her but I can see she might get upset about that too, so it's your call(plus I'm not sure if you have kids to take care of etc)

    good luck

    Answer by tntmom1027 at 11:33 PM on Jul. 9, 2011

  • Give her time. People deal with rape in different ways.

    Answer by mommy_of_two388 at 11:37 PM on Jul. 9, 2011

  • I would go check on her except that she lives 20 miles away, and my car is right above E my dh got called into work early, so I cant even use his car. All I can do is just wait till the morning to call her. Im just frustrated

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 11:37 PM on Jul. 9, 2011

  • I would call her in the morning, she may not answer but I would leave her a message letting her know you are thinking about her and that she can call you anytime. She just needs time to process everything and to deal with it(as I'm sure you understand).

    She will most likely be dealing with a bunch of emotions a big one being guilt as it was her boyfriend(who you tried to warn her about) who attacked her as well as the legal outcomes or lack of them. I know I still deal with a lot of guilt and regret for what happened to me.

    Answer by tntmom1027 at 11:43 PM on Jul. 9, 2011

  • If hes not in jail she didnt file charges.

    Answer by kylie20062007 at 11:53 PM on Jul. 9, 2011

  • You can call the local police and ask them to do a "well check" to make sure she's ok.

    Answer by SC_MomofTeens at 12:43 AM on Jul. 10, 2011

  • I am so sorry that your friend was raped, and I am sorry that you can't reach your friend to make sure she is ok. I agree with SC MomofTeens-  call the police and let them know the situation, and that you are concerned because you can't get ahold of her.  They might be able to check on her and let you know what is going on.  I don't know why they have not arrested him yet, maybe it is as others have mentioned- they have not caught up with him yet, or they are still processing evidence and getting the paperwork going, or maybe she dropped / did not press charges against him.  I hope that your friend is ok, and that her jerk bf gets arrested soon and gets jail time for this!!!


    Answer by MizLee at 1:01 AM on Jul. 10, 2011