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How do i get my kids to quit lieing and playing both parents against eachother

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Missy339

Asked by Missy339 at 1:24 PM on Jul. 10, 2011 in General Parenting

Level 2 (4 Credits)
Answers (5)
  • There are certain things that are for me to decide and likewise for dh. So when a kis comes to me asking a Q that is mostly dh's domain I'll ask them if they asked daddy and what he said. If they hadn't asked yet then I'd ask them what they think he might say.
    Also when either of you have set a limit on something then you need to make sure you communicate that to the other parent. My one dd was giving big attitude yesturday and I told her that if she didn't knock it off then she couldn't wear dressed for 2 days (that's a big deal to my girls! lol). I had to make sure dh knew because she will often take a dress to him and ask him to help her put it on. We're onto them know.
    If it's something that can wait or I feel they might be lying then I tell them we'll have to wait till we ask their dad, either when he comes home or call him. That usually get's them telling the truth. Set a punishment for them if they lie.
    AmandaH321

    Answer by AmandaH321 at 1:30 PM on Jul. 10, 2011

  • you both have to be in agreement on what's allowed and what's not allowed, what kind of discipline you do, ect. otherwise it will keep on. you have to know when you're being lied to. if you both have agreed on something that your child is trying to tell you the other said was ok on, you then know you're being lied to and can discipline them appropriately for lying to you while at the same time you don't look like an idiot to your kids. GL
    armywife43

    Answer by armywife43 at 1:31 PM on Jul. 10, 2011

  • would you be offended if i say good question and ask you to email me when someone helps. i too have this same problem, the lying is the worst with my 10 year old she lies about the most mundane things. i mean i do not want her lying at all but seriously who lies about putting waffles in the toaster at her age???? as for the playing mom against dad thing you just have to be strong and when they try that let them know out right mommy and daddy are a team and no matter how much whining, fit throwing and what ever else they can throw at u guys u will not break. but might i suggest a meeting of the minds to assure u and dad are on the same page. i find that sometimes this is how mine get away with it. hope this helps:)
    4g4b

    Answer by 4g4b at 1:36 PM on Jul. 10, 2011

  • Once you realize the kids are playing you against, hubby and he sees it too, that's the first step. Both of you have to put your foot down and tell the kids you know what they are doing and it's not going to work. That from now on BOTH of you will talk about whatever it is they are asking about and make a decision. The lying is a little harder to deal with but can be done. First and foremost call them on it then a punishment for lying is called for. Taking away phone, games, fav shows on TV, computer time, play time. Whatever fits your kids. Stick t your guns and don't waver at all. It will be frustrating and aggravating, but I guarantee, it can be done. Good luck.
    SilverMystik

    Answer by SilverMystik at 1:43 PM on Jul. 10, 2011

  • I ALWAYS TOLD MY KIDS THAT I WOULD FIND OUT & THAT IT WOULD COME BACK & BITE THEM N THE BUTT.THEN THEY'D FESS UP.THE PITTING US AGAINST EACH OTHER DIDN'T LAST LONG. i OULD GO & TALK TO HIM,JUST TO MAKE SURE.
    mammawdot14

    Answer by mammawdot14 at 5:02 PM on Jul. 10, 2011

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