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What should be done when a couple starts bringing out the worst in each other?


Asked by Anonymous at 2:35 PM on Jul. 10, 2011 in Relationships

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Answers (5)
  • My thoughts based on my experiences.

    Usually when a couple gets to this point it's more often than not due to a whole lot of built up resentments, underlying problems and issues that have never been rectified. Many times the true issues that are the root of the problems have never been addressed effectively much less rectified. Underlying problems/issues and resentments in a relationship fester and slowly poison the entire relationship not just the area in which the problems/issues/resentments started. Fighting about everything, bickering over little things, back biting, baiting one another, playing tit for tat and so on are usually just systems of bigger issues that need to be taken care of. Most people just react in those ways because they do not know how to honestly, openly and safely communicate with one another about the real deep issues that are the true problems.

    Answer by pixie_trix at 3:03 PM on Jul. 10, 2011

  • A break, or counseling.

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:36 PM on Jul. 10, 2011

  • Found out the reason why it's starting now. Did something else happen that triggered this? Is there no commitment to making things better? Counseling can help but also there needs to be compromise and a change in the way you each react. Something has to break this cycle, and it may have to be you taking the initiative. If you normally get angry when he pushes your buttons, dont react with anger but react with an attempt to understand. Since you didn't get much detail, I can't really provide more specific advice.But when you've tried your best, then a separation may be needed. It should be easy to be with the right person.

    Answer by hellokittykat at 2:45 PM on Jul. 10, 2011

  • I see the cycle, and where it could lead me. It is the repetition and both of us make promises to do better but in the moment that is blown out of the water.

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 3:02 PM on Jul. 10, 2011

  • Pixie trix couldn't have said it any better.

    Answer by noteven1nce at 4:12 PM on Jul. 10, 2011

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