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what would YOU do?

ok i know this will sound bad but i just need some advice. ok last year i was dating my current bf but i cheated on him with my ex and ended up getting preg. i didnt want to have sex with him but i was pressureed into it. so i asked for forgiveness and my bf chose to stay with me. i didnt talk to my ex for a long long time bc i was so mad. well now that he seems to be more mature bout the situation he wants to be a part of her life (shes 5 months). idk whats best for my daughter i know my bf is capable of being her dad. he doesnt want me or my daughter to have anything to do with him. so my ? is you think its best for her father to be out the picture till she is 18? or shuld he be apart of her life since hes willing to take responsibility? its either all or nothing with my bf =/

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 10:26 AM on Dec. 17, 2008 in Relationships

Answers (8)
  • It's not fair to punish your daughter for your mistake. As long as her bio dad is a decent guy, you should allow him to see her.

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:29 AM on Dec. 17, 2008

  • are you sure that he is her father if you where with both of them? if he is then yes he should be part of her life. should might be really mad if when she turns 18 your like hey by the way this man is your real father. i would let him be part of her just maybe not a whole lot like he can see her on the weekends with you and your BF there but its important that they are apart of each others lives

    Answer by mommy033 at 10:30 AM on Dec. 17, 2008

  • Get u a test grl first to see who the daddy is then go from there! If your ex is the daddy yes most defenity he should be a part of this babys life.If not drop his butt like a hot pancake, stick w/ your bf he's good to u right?

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:33 AM on Dec. 17, 2008

  • mommy033...

    i totally agree!!!!! gahh! lol. and yes he is the father bc i didnt have sex with my bf around that time. and i even told him..ya kno id be furious if i went 18 years without knowing. he just wants me and her to himself. he admitted that. he doesnt think my ex deserves her. hes not a bad guy anymore and this is bout my daughter not my bf.

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:34 AM on Dec. 17, 2008

  • btw we did get a test and he is the father..(my ex that is)

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:35 AM on Dec. 17, 2008

  • IF he is in fact the father and he is mature enough to be a father, then YES he should be a part of her life.. IMO.. Your current bf was willing to forgive you, this will prove how much of a MAN he really is.. She could be a very lucky little girl and have 2 men love her and be a dad to her.. As she gets older then YOU can explain to her the situation.. It could be a good thing or a bad thing, depending on the maturity of the 3 of you!! Good luck..

    Answer by honeys_sugamama at 10:41 AM on Dec. 17, 2008

  • If he is the father, ofcourse he should be apart of her life. You have no right to pick and choice.
    The father of your child has every right to be apart of your daughters life. Wait until she is 18 is not the correct answer. Your current bf has no say in this matter. The father of your daughter can take you to court for his parenting time. What it comes down to is your daughter needs you and her father.

    Answer by Dannee at 10:49 AM on Dec. 17, 2008

  • Although you love your BF very much and obviously he feels the same way about you, you could end up regretting making a LIFE LONG choice for your child based on someone who has not made a life long commitment to you. I understand your predictament, I had a friend go through something simular. In the end, she's not with either man but her Baby has two dad's and she pissed of the biodad trying to save her BF feelings that she is now in and out of court every month. She splits HER parenting time with the ex step dad because he was kind enough to accept the child as his own. She see's her child very little ;(

    Answer by hotrodlassie at 11:50 AM on Dec. 17, 2008

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