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My husband is cheating

I found out a few weeks ago that my husband has been cheating on me. Since we started dating he has been flirting with girls online. I thought it all stopped when we had a big fall out about it. But then I found out that not only is he doing it online, but in person as well. I know of three girls so far. When I confronted him about it he got mad and tried to blame me for it. He even choke slammed me into the ground. Yes I'm also 6 months pregnant. Since then he has been really lovey. Trying to butter me up I'm sure. I cant go to his unit about it (in the Army). Cuz I dont want to get him in trouble or have them send me back home either.

I guess my question is...Do you think there is a chance, even the tiniest one, that he could change? I've talked about Marriage Counseling. He agrees, but hasnt made an app yet. I know he loves me. He has too. Why else would he have married me right?


Asked by lblanenship3 at 11:15 AM on Dec. 17, 2008 in Relationships

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This question is closed.
Answers (24)
  • First off saying love doesnt cheat is a crock of shit people make mistakes!!!! However it's not like this was a one time slip up you said you "know of" 3 girls already, well sorry to burst your bubble there is probably more and especilly if its online deals that is a vicious vicous cycle I honasly wish that there was no such thing as dating websites and messengers and all that crap!! Anyway YOU need to tell him that you will not tolerate anymore of whats going on and that of he ever touches you again he's gone and you will go to his unit and report him, and YOU need to call and make the appointment with the counselour, dont wait on him cause it'll never get done!!

    Answer by scaredmommy08 at 11:29 AM on Dec. 17, 2008

  • Sounds like he married you to control you. Love does not cheat, love does not abuse. Get the hell out of that relationship while you still have the ability to. The longer you stay, the worse it will get, and the baby will make things worse, not better. When that baby comes, he'll have even more control over you. Stand up for yourself and the life you deserve. No one deserves to be treated this way.

    Answer by Kimebs at 11:18 AM on Dec. 17, 2008

  • honey the man put his hands on you while you were pregnant there is not enough change in the world to make up for that. what if you would have lost that baby. and omg no wouldn't want to get him in trouble the bastard. and why would they have the right to send you back home you can live wherever you chose. and as for him loving you well maybe he does but maybe he also married you so he could have more control over you. sorry if this sounds harsh but you have alot to think about and the first thing should be that child

    Answer by jodi205 at 11:18 AM on Dec. 17, 2008

  • I think you are blinded by him. this is so sad. this will happen to you again. report him, and leave. so sad. not worth trying to "save"

    Answer by charisma10 at 11:21 AM on Dec. 17, 2008



    I am so sorry that you don't have some family around to give you a reality check. You need to grow up and take care of yourself and your baby.

    He put his hands on you and you don't want HIM to get in trouble?

    Oh baby....I am so sorry for you.

    Answer by Wimsey at 11:26 AM on Dec. 17, 2008

  • CONT.......I think that every marriage should try to do as much as possible before you consider a divorce, i know i didnt with my first marriage and i maybe should have but I just didnt love him so it was probably best but i still have a sence of failure with the whole thing!! go make your appointment and give it a chance if things dont change get outta there!! Good luck!!

    Answer by scaredmommy08 at 11:30 AM on Dec. 17, 2008

  • He won't change. My ex husband was a cheater. We went to counsiling on base and I was told " That's the way it is deal with it" I was only 17 and thought she meant all men cheat. I relized as I matured that she meant HE would always cheat. So, if you don't mind the cheating and abuse stay and stop complaining. If you want something different for yourself move on.

    Answer by hotrodlassie at 11:32 AM on Dec. 17, 2008

  • If you ever need to talk feel free to PM me ;) I've been there

    Answer by hotrodlassie at 11:34 AM on Dec. 17, 2008

  • no sweey he doesnt love you. he wouldnt disrespect you if he did. but you love him so you continue to wear your rose colored glasses. those glasses are so hard to not only see thru & 2 take off. im sorry you r goin thru this. its miserable especially when you prego. if he lays another hand on you, you should report him &/or press charges. hes not only hurting you but endangering your baby. If you continue to allow this to happen, then you are endangering your baby as well Shame on you for that! no man is worth that! love or no love! The only way he will change is if the consequences are bad enough he will go to jail for it. Some dont even care even then. Angry management is what he need & a phyc. evaluation. he married you to lock you down, not because he loves you but because he wants to own you like property. been there done that!

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:34 AM on Dec. 17, 2008


    Answer by Terrilp at 11:35 AM on Dec. 17, 2008