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Answers / Parenting / Preschoolers (3-4)

A Question about ADD/ADHD...

I just got home from DD 4yo check up. The Dr came in played with her, talked to her, and then he started to ask me if I had concerns b/c he did. We talked about family, our situation and history, and then he said he'd like to have her evaluated for ADD or ADHD. He talked a lot about how she would act if she did have it, and it was spot on! In the past she had been evaluated for autism, which thankfully came to nothing. DH and I have been concerned about her development for a while now, so the Dr saying he had concerns didn't really shock me.

He gave me paperwork to fill out, and for her teacher at preschool. He said there is so much that can be done and I do not have to medicate her if I do not want to.

Anyway, my question is...Does anyone else have a preschooler with ADD/ADHD? What do you do in terms of behavior problems? How do you cope with the struggles? And how do I help her?

You can post Anonymously if you like, just please play nice. I'm a real person with a real daugther, Thank you!! :)

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willngingersmom

Asked by willngingersmom at 3:13 PM on Jul. 11, 2011 in Preschoolers (3-4)

Level 13 (1,226 Credits)
Answers (8)
  • what type of symptoms does she have that have worried you? My son is 3-1/2 and I wonder sometimes if he has it/will have it..
    maxsmom11807

    Answer by maxsmom11807 at 3:17 PM on Jul. 11, 2011

  • I do not, however my niece is add. It wasn't official until she hit 7th grade! At that point, my sister was "hands in the air" what to do. She had struggled so long, and had she known to get the diagnosis sooner- I think she would have taken her sooner... but sterotypical labels prevented her from doing it. After she was given the diagnosis, the schools could intervene and offer SO much more time, teaching and leiniancy (sp?) my sister use to sit and work for 4 hours on any given day with just a standard test w/ her before she was diagnosed. and always did tons of hours of homework. because she simply couldn't focus. With treatment and meds and extra school support it was a huge turn around for thier whole family. Just wanted to say, the sooner the diagnosis and treatment the better things will be for you all. As far as punishment, I don't think they treated her any different than their other kids but im not positive.
    2teens2LOs

    Answer by 2teens2LOs at 3:21 PM on Jul. 11, 2011

  • ADD with my niece was described to me as if you give them a list of 3 or 4 things and expect her to follow it through step by step, by the time she completes #1, she has no clue what the others are.... thus making homework, chores, ect a ton harder on them. My sis said she could tell niece, go get your laundry, take it upstairs, lay it on your bed and then put it away and by the time she was getting the laundry... niece didn't know where or what to do with it. That's just an example... but you can see what I mean.
    2teens2LOs

    Answer by 2teens2LOs at 3:23 PM on Jul. 11, 2011

  • Thank you, 2teens2LOs! That's what she does!! It makes everything just a little harder than with my boys (who are 6 1/2 and 2). She forgets or doesn't listen to simple directions. She will even walk into the bathroom and stand there, b/c she's forgotten why she 's there, and it has lead to many "accidents". She also shows no signs of "stranger danger" and will follow/talk to anyone. She doesn't separate real from fantasy. She doesn't focus on anything unless she is in a room, alone, and it has to be something like playing with barbie for her to focus. She is very quick to anger, she argues, she hits the other kids if they don't comply with her. She never sits still, like she has no OFF switch. If she breaks something or hurts someone, its always someone else's fault...It goes on and on, but I'll wrap up there!
    willngingersmom

    Comment by willngingersmom (original poster) at 3:33 PM on Jul. 11, 2011

  • Like 2teens2LOs' sister, I put off having my daughter diagnosed. I didn't want her labeled or unnecessarily medicated. I also got to the "throwing my hands in the air" stage when my daughter was in 7th grade, and I finally gave in and took her to a doctor. Since I was unwilling to believe in ADHD when she was little, I was also stuck in trying to make all sorts of discipline techniques work, and I usually ended up frustrated. My husband and I took a Love & Logic parenting class around the same time we had our daughter diagnosed, and honestly it made more of a difference for us than the medication did with things like following house rules and doing chores. I highly recommend the Love & Logic parenting program for all parents, but especially for parents with kids who are a bit harder than average.  We're still struggling to find the right answer for school, but L&L made a huge difference at home.
    TweenAndTwinMom

    Answer by TweenAndTwinMom at 4:17 PM on Jul. 11, 2011

  • My twins are now nearing 4, and when I look back at my older daughter at the same age I can definitely see a difference. She was far more difficult to handle than the two of them put together, but when she was little I just kept thinking I wasn't doing something right...I didn't want to believe she could actually have a real problem. Kudos to you for looking into this now rather than waiting for things to continue down the wrong path. GL!
    TweenAndTwinMom

    Answer by TweenAndTwinMom at 4:17 PM on Jul. 11, 2011

  • DD was diagnosed at age 5. The best book I found on the subject was this: Barkley, R. A. , Taking charge of ADHD: The complete, authoritative guide for parents. It has great suggestions on parenting techniques that will work for ANY kid - not just those with a diagnosis. We finally put DD on ADHD meds when she turned 9. In middle school, her diagnosis was changed to include Aspergers. Keep Aspergers in the back of your mind should she have sensory isues in addition to ADHD. Make sure that she gets social skills classes.
    JSD24

    Answer by JSD24 at 5:01 PM on Jul. 11, 2011

  • Thank you everyone for your answers!! You are all so awesome :) Very helpful!!
    willngingersmom

    Comment by willngingersmom (original poster) at 5:12 PM on Jul. 11, 2011

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Answers / Parenting / Preschoolers (3-4)