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3 Bumps

Our childs b-mom offered to be our surrogate

Our child's birthmom knows that we have been trying to adopt. She has always said that she wishes there is something she could do to help. Now, I guess she is in a position where she can. She has offered to be a surrogate for us. She is wonderful and we love her more than words can say.
Here is my question, is this a wise decision?
I'd appreciate any input - please do not "tear" her or I apart and insult us. Just your opinion, negative or positive. If there are things you think I should think about let me know. Constructive criticism is more than welcome

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 7:10 PM on Jul. 11, 2011 in Adoption

Answers (13)
  • I say go for it!
    mommy_of_two388

    Answer by mommy_of_two388 at 7:11 PM on Jul. 11, 2011

  • Your child's birth mom? As in you've adopted a child from her? If she's done it once, I would trust her again :)
    sugamama3

    Answer by sugamama3 at 7:15 PM on Jul. 11, 2011

  • yes, we adopted her child
    Anonymous

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 7:17 PM on Jul. 11, 2011

  • The legal aspects....There is a default legal assumption in most countries that the woman giving birth to a child is that child's legal mother. In some jurisdictions the possibility of surrogacy has been legally allowed and as a result, the intended parents may be recognized as the legal parents right from the birth of a baby. Many states now issue pre-birth orders through the courts placing the name(s) of the intended parent(s) on the birth certificate from the start. In other states that do not issue such orders, the possibility of surrogacy is either not recognized (all contracts specifying different legal parents are void), or is prohibited.

    momand4kids

    Answer by momand4kids at 7:19 PM on Jul. 11, 2011

  • And she's willing to carry another one for you? Sounds like a great woman :)
    sugamama3

    Answer by sugamama3 at 7:19 PM on Jul. 11, 2011

  • She sounds like an amazing woman to do that for you :) Good luck with whatever you decide!!
    MommaRoxanne

    Answer by MommaRoxanne at 7:20 PM on Jul. 11, 2011

  • Sounds like you have the perfect surrogate, go for it! best of luck!
    older

    Answer by older at 7:23 PM on Jul. 11, 2011

  • She is an amazing woman and I do trust her. I know right now she has a few things going on so I wonder if this would be too much on her right now or, if it would end up "helping" (for lack of a better term) all of us out.
    Anonymous

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 7:30 PM on Jul. 11, 2011

  • Is she looking to use her egg and your husbands sperm or your egg, his sperm or donor for both, etc?

    So you know, Surrogacy can be really expensive and isn't legal in every state: it can be a lot more expensive than adoption and there is the risk of it not taking. I would do a lot of research. Good luck
    2ndtimewish

    Answer by 2ndtimewish at 8:12 PM on Jul. 11, 2011

  • I agree with 2ndtimewish. You should research the process first because it can be very expensive and isn't legal everywhere. GL!
    The3Vs

    Answer by The3Vs at 11:02 AM on Jul. 12, 2011

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