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Is your best friend a guy?

One of my best friends is a guy and I tell him everything but my SO doesn't want me to talk to him. He doesn't like him and that's his only reason. I've never been intimate with this guy and never had any feelings for him in that sense. I actually kind of think of him like my girl friends. I know it bothers Mikey that he has had a crush on me before but he never really has acted on those feelings but he has admitted that he thinks I'm hot. I don't think it's fair either because my SO talks to girls and I don't always like them either.

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Lizzie32390

Asked by Lizzie32390 at 12:52 PM on Dec. 17, 2008 in Relationships

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Answers (17)
  • There are girls that I don't mind him talking to but he's bothered when I talk to a guy that isn't his friend. What am I suppose to do? I don't want an argument between me and him but I don't want to give up a friendship for my SO and plus I've been friends with this person longer than I've been with him. He has said that about one of his friends that was a girl but that was different because they did date and have a sexual history together and that's why I opposed their friendship. SO I need some advice please and no bashing!
    Lizzie32390

    Answer by Lizzie32390 at 12:53 PM on Dec. 17, 2008

  • Yes, my best friend is a guy...as far as my DH not wanting that to happen. he really doesn't say much...i told him when we first got together that i would not drop my friends to please him if he couldn't accept them then we didn't need to be together, and if he couldn't trust me around them we didn't need to be together...in which he knew Stack and I were really close because everytime he would see me before we got together i was with Stack...he has actually made the comment.."he is the only guy that i trust around you not to pull any shit"...we've all been in a bar and stack as smacked my ass just being a smartass but no one ever thinks anything of it!!! So is your SO jealous or afraid you'll leave him for this guy??? PM me if you want
    brice08

    Answer by brice08 at 12:56 PM on Dec. 17, 2008

  • my absolute bestest friend ever is a guy. and has been since we were 9. when me and my hubby started dating i was very honest and told him that there had been guys in the past i had broken up wiht because they didn't like him. i wasn't going to let a guy come in between an amazing friendship and he understood that and he knew if he did try and make me choose it would be Keith. But they get along great and my hubby has no problems with hiM!! its hard for people to understand that a guy and a girl can be best friends AND NOT BE NOTHING MORE. My advice is just tell him what you told us. and you will NOT pick. and to not put you in that situation. because he won't like the outcome. HE SHOULD TRUST YOU.
    krazyash023

    Answer by krazyash023 at 12:57 PM on Dec. 17, 2008

  • Your SO knows you tell your best guy friend everything. I think its completely normal not to want you to be so close with another guy, we as women share almost everything and I can imagine your SO wouldn't want the best guy friend to know everything that's going on in your life. He also probably wants to be the one you can confide in that way.

    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:57 PM on Dec. 17, 2008

  • You shouldn't tell him everything. You husband needs to come first and needs to be respected unconditionally. If he doesn't want you telling this guy intimate details about your love life, then don't. One of my best friends is a guy and we talk just about every day but we are both married and never talk about our relationships or the problems we have. We'll tell each other what's going on and how our spouses are doing, but nothing intimate. This saves us from ever having our SO's have to think something is up.
    feesharose

    Answer by feesharose at 12:58 PM on Dec. 17, 2008

  • My BFF is a guy - he was my "maid of honor".

    We don't complain to each other about our spouses since 1) that's tacky and 2) it's boring.

    And we talk/email 2-3 times a week.
    Wimsey

    Answer by Wimsey at 1:01 PM on Dec. 17, 2008

  • yes ,my best friend is a guy, we grew up together,,we've been there for each other in good /bad times... he has been there for me as i have been there for him,,,,,my ex thought we had something and i told him never,to me my best friend is like a brother to me,,,,and our children call me auntie and my kids call him uncle,,,,,so we are an extended family,,even though we are best friends,,,,firends are people who are there for you always no matter what ,or who....
    seexxymama4u2me

    Answer by seexxymama4u2me at 1:02 PM on Dec. 17, 2008

  • I had a very close guy friend and had to drop him when I got with my hubby. This guy told me he liked me and everything. We were very close and i did not know that he liked me until his ex girlfriend who was also my roomate at the time told me. I confronted him and he denied it then but admitted to me later that he wished his girl was more like me. Yea so depends on the situations i guess. SOme guys no matter what will not except a best friend who happens to be a guy.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:04 PM on Dec. 17, 2008

  • My best friend of over 20 years is a guy...but, he's also gay! My husband would NOT be "okay" with me having a male best friend otherwise. He tells me (with a hint of sarcasm), that men who are best friends with women have ulterior motives--they're always HOPING there will be "something" in it for them...or, they're gay. Conversely my husband doesn't have any single female friends (not including mutual coupled friends) for that reason...and I'm certainly okay with that--as I've learned first hand that women can't always be trusted when it comes to someone else's man! LOL
    LoriKeet

    Answer by LoriKeet at 1:15 PM on Dec. 17, 2008

  • I can see how it would bother your hubby if this friend has feelings for you. Even if you have never had feelings for him. Your husband should come above any other man. When you got married you vowed to put him first. You are team through thick or thin. If your BF was a woman and he had a problem with her, a legitimate problem not just a control issue, I'd say the same thing. He needs to come first and he needs to know that he is first. His concern is legit if this friend has feelings for you and tells you that you are hot.
    beckcorc

    Answer by beckcorc at 1:17 PM on Dec. 17, 2008

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