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How do I keep things fair?

I remarried on 3-21-2011. I have a 9 year old son from a previous relationship. His father is hurting pretty bad for cash, so he doesn't take our son to do a whole lot. My new husband has an 8 year old daughter. Her mother receives child support each month and recent took her to the beach. Prior to their trip, she[his daughter] was at our house bragging about going to my son. It really hurt his feelings cause he wasn't going. I want to take him to the beach, but he wants it just to be the 3 of us(him, me, and my husband) since she just went. My husband thinks its wrong not to take his daughter. I just want everyone to be happy. Please help!

Answer Question

Asked by joshuamom5909 at 12:46 AM on Jul. 12, 2011 in General Parenting

Level 3 (18 Credits)
Answers (6)
  • To be honest, I think it would be unfair to not take her. She is his daughter and he probably wants to spend his vacation with her too. Think about if the roles were reversed, how you would feel. Good luck.

    Answer by mommyIam08 at 12:52 AM on Jul. 12, 2011

  • I think you should tell the daughter not to brag that its not nice and not a respectful thing to do, but kids do that, i think all of you should go to the beach, its just fair.

    Answer by MommyBre21 at 12:55 AM on Jul. 12, 2011

  • Should i take my son without my husband?

    Comment by joshuamom5909 (original poster) at 1:06 AM on Jul. 12, 2011

  • you could have a mommy son day, i dont see a problem there i would talk to your hubby about it though first.

    Answer by MommyBre21 at 1:07 AM on Jul. 12, 2011

  • I would address the hurtful behavior of your SD, but your son's wish to exclude isn't fair either. What SD does with her mom and your son does with his father does NOT count toward time spent with you and your unique little family together, so is irrelevant. Pack the picnic basket, grab some flip flops, and EVERYONE should head for the beach! They'll have a chance to build memories together, and I bet they'll have more fun together than she had alone, so hopefully she'll take that away with her.

    Answer by terirose22 at 2:23 AM on Jul. 12, 2011

  • We are a blended family and we don't even try to make everything fair. It wasn't right for your SD to brag in front of your son and I'd put a stop to that. If your son wants to go to the beach with just you and your DH I'd try to make that happen. There will be something that comes up that just you, DH, and your SD do. Don't worry about the fairness.

    Answer by CometGirl at 9:49 AM on Jul. 12, 2011

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