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2 Bumps

My ex seems to think it is his personal duty to populate the world!!!!! UPDATE

I have a 6 year old DD with my ex. We dated about 9 months, I got pregnant and he took off. Since then, all he does is pay child support, he doesn't see her, he doesn't send presents, anything. The only reason he even pays child support is because there is an order. Well in the last 6 years, he has had AT LEAST 4 kids besides mine and now he is "engaged" there is no ring or wedding date, they just say their engaged and she is also pregnant. Now my ex has had me served papers because he wants to lower the child support because he has had other children. Well too bad, I guess he should have thought about that before he had more children. Currently, he pays $650 a month and makes about $3100 a month. Now in our court system, they will rarely lower child support amounts because the parent paying has more children why, because I can't control how many children he has so why should I get less support because he has more children? Would it be fair if it was reduced to help him with his other kids? Basically what they do right now is I get CS based off of his income, the next mom gets CS based off of his income minus my CS and the 3ird gets based off of his income minus mine and the 2and mom's CS and so on so after all 4 of us have gotten child support (one woman has 2 kids with him) he only has about $1,000 left and that doesn't include the woman he is engaged to because her baby isn't born yet.

I heard back from my attorney about this. She said that the most they could do is take 10% (like I said) but since this isn't just one or two other kids, this is 5 more kids, it shows that my ex is not being responsible and the judge will more then likely not order a reduction at all. Also, if the judge does, I can enforce him paying his half of medical, dental and activities  that he has already been ordered to pay and I have not been asking for to give him a break. All children will be provided for, I get $650, the second mom gets five hundred and something, the 3ird gets four hundred and something and the fourth who has 2 kids with him (twins) gets five hundred and something. He makes at least $3100 a month (I think he makes a few hundred dollars more now actually) so he has between $1100 and $1500 a month left. I understand that it is not uncommon for a pregnant woman not to work but when your fiance only brings home that amount, you don't always have that luxury.  

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 1:03 PM on Jul. 12, 2011 in Parenting Debate

Answers (23)
  • They CAN NOT & WILL NOT lower child support! It goes off of income alone not the amount of children the father has, another child CAN NOT be punished by lowering CS because the dad can't keep it in his pants!!!
    something_

    Answer by something_ at 1:09 PM on Jul. 12, 2011

  • Sucks for him I guess. I don't think you are obligated to lower the amount you get, because like you said, you can't control what he does(like going out and making more babies). I don't know if the court would lower it, but I wouldn't think so...like you said.

    tntmom1027

    Answer by tntmom1027 at 1:10 PM on Jul. 12, 2011

  • Sounds like a real winner.
    pookiekins34

    Answer by pookiekins34 at 1:10 PM on Jul. 12, 2011

  • He was the nicest guy and then when he took off, I guess he realized he could easily do that and decided he could have as many as he wanted
    Anonymous

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 1:11 PM on Jul. 12, 2011

  • That is HIS problem. Not your daughters. Maybe, like something said, he should keep it in his pants. (Or cover it).
    TARARENEE

    Answer by TARARENEE at 1:11 PM on Jul. 12, 2011

  • Yes some states have whats called "special circumstances" that DO take into account the amount of children a non custodial parent is legally responsible for.
    yesmaam

    Answer by yesmaam at 1:12 PM on Jul. 12, 2011

  • I have a son who fathered a child , marriedthe lady, got divorced and fathered another. Now he is married to a lady and they also have a child. So I feel that I can answer your question fairly. NO, you should not allow him to pay less child support. He is not supporting you . The money is for his first born child. I would assume that the other ladies were aware of his history, but whether they were or not, they went into this with their eyes open and could have prevented another child before it happened. This is not your responsibility nor your child's. I feel you should be thankful that he pays child support and is out of your child's life considering what I am hearing. In my son's case, I am glad to say he involved in his children's lives even though it put a real crunch on his wallet.
    Dardenella

    Answer by Dardenella at 1:18 PM on Jul. 12, 2011

  • You seem pretty bitter and want him to take care of y'all's child together before he takes care of any other child. You should honestly be glad that you receive child support. My ex doesn't use his visitation, send presents or cards, OR send child support. What your ex does in his personal life is none of your business, quite frankly.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:24 PM on Jul. 12, 2011

  • Anon, I am not bitter, I just think it's ridiculous that he thinks that he can populate the world and my DD should get less child support because of it. And no, what he does in his personal life is not my business UNTIL I have to go to court because he is trying to pay less child support because he can't keep it in his pants.
    Anonymous

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 1:27 PM on Jul. 12, 2011

  • Where I live, they do take into account "other" children. People have expenses, and CS based on gross income isn't a fair assessment. Here, one can file a rebuttal with ALL of their expenses included, which could end in them not paying anything. I do think he should support his daughter, but the other children deserve to be taken care of as well. Maybe what happened to you happened to the other women, and it's not the childrens' fault; they still deserve a roof over their heads, clothes on their body, and food in their mouths. $650 is quite a bit of money for CS for one child too; I hope they do lower it so the other babies can be supported as well
    MeandMyBabes

    Answer by MeandMyBabes at 1:38 PM on Jul. 12, 2011

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