Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Did I just get a blow off?

So I have been "seeing" this single dad(he has full custody), we have talked for months over the phone for work, then we started exchanging emails and talking on the personal phones. So we finally meet and we hit it off!! All he wanted to do was spoil me that night whatever I wanted!! It was fantastic, nothing physical happened except kissing! But this past week he barely calls he writes short emails asking how I am, etc. So I am blunt and ask him whats up, he tells me he is busy with sick kid, holiday and work. I don't know, am I overthinking, because he wasn't busy previously. What do you all think, just give him space?

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 2:37 PM on Dec. 17, 2008 in Relationships

Answers (9)
  • You don't want to seem to needy. If he is truly busy, you should give him the benefit of the doubt. When he stops all together, then you might worry. I would just let it play out and not email him until he initiates it.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:41 PM on Dec. 17, 2008

  • if that were me, i would ignore him like he's ignoring you! i mean, no use in pushing him if he doesnt want to see you anymore.
    and yeah, that is the lamest excuse EVER!
    im busy too but i somehow find time with others!
    americansugar80

    Answer by americansugar80 at 2:41 PM on Dec. 17, 2008

  • Many people get busier over the holidays...have to entertain relatives, friends, etc. Give him a little space, express your sincere concern for his sick child, and if you have a New Years party that you could invite him to then do that.

    He might be scared, so by backing off a bit then he won't have as much to be afraid of.
    indigostone

    Answer by indigostone at 2:44 PM on Dec. 17, 2008

  • Are you infatuated? Do you love him? You sounds like you are head over heels. I would try to go out again. DOn't give up. It is Xmas and people do get busy. Give him a breather ,bu tif you really want the guy, even just to hold you and talk I would still go for it. Just don't seem desperate, be cool about it.
    jareda69

    Answer by jareda69 at 2:52 PM on Dec. 17, 2008

  • i agree with not being too needy, no guy wants that especially a dad. give him some time to work on his own things and be encouraging towards him, wish that he has a good day or that his kid feels better yada yada...
    if it continues to get worse then maybe its a sign from him that its just not going to happen and he doesnt want to hurt your feelings
    just remember not all guys are jerks, be patient
    learae

    Answer by learae at 2:53 PM on Dec. 17, 2008

  • It may be painful, but I agree with the above answers about not seeming needy. So back off. Distance yourself. As difficult as it will be, delay replying to emails and keep answers as if you were just acquaintances, with a little tiny bit of personality sprinkled in, but nothing intimate or that you wouldn't say to a guy at work, for example. Pleasant but not as if you have expectations of him. Strictly mildly friendly. If he is interested, then when he's had time to digest what is going on, he will likely get back with you. If he isn't interested, then you won't make him want to run away screaming, anyway, and the non-needy stance may catch his interest.
    Bmat

    Answer by Bmat at 3:14 PM on Dec. 17, 2008

  • Answering jareda69:

    I am absolutely enamored by this man, he is like none I have met ever!! And I don't want to give up so I need to find a balance between being needy/desperate and "cool". That is really hard for me since as a picky single mom them "pickens are slim"!!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:24 PM on Dec. 17, 2008

  • OMG. I sensed that in you. You know when you really are head over heels you don't say the right things or act the way you want cuz you are so enamored. God I know how you feel. It is slim pickens. Too bad you can't just call him up for drinks and go as a group witth a gf and her buds and then with a little motivational push they would disappear after helping you hook up literally with the guy. I actually have done this for friends.I feel bad when I can sense the attraction for someone between a man and woman and you just need that extra arrow from cupid to get things rolling.
    jareda69

    Answer by jareda69 at 3:37 PM on Dec. 17, 2008

  • It's what usually happens when you get to know someone before seeing them. When you finally get to see them face to face it's not what you expected. You have a great night then slowly but surely break it off. Just chalk this one up to experience and move on.

    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:48 PM on Dec. 17, 2008

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.