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3 Bumps

I am a pregnant newlywed, my husband is very selfish! I am 8 months pregnant with twins and I honestly do the best that I can to play the role as a wife. I clean n cook. But my husband thinks it's a womans job to cook clean n wash his clothes. Like for example we just came home from my in-laws and it's 11 o clock at night he expects me to cook a full course meal. HELP!!

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 10:57 PM on Jul. 12, 2011 in Pregnancy

Answers (15)
  • go into your room and go to bed. He can order a frickin pizza. take it easy on yourself and speak up for yourself or he is only going to demand more from you. good luck!!
    bloomsr

    Answer by bloomsr at 10:59 PM on Jul. 12, 2011

  • Tell him that you are not his mother and you don't need to bend to his every whim...he needs to grow up and learn how to be a man. He is not the baby here, the 2 growing inside you are the babies, and he is going to have a rude awakening when they are born!
    AF4life

    Answer by AF4life at 11:01 PM on Jul. 12, 2011

  • was he like this before you married him ? if the answer is yes then it is your fault for getting stuck with him -you should have known better BUT - if he got like this after u married him (that tends to hAPpen quite often -the men change after the "i do") you should teach him how to treat u and stand your ground. you are pregnant, he should be treating u to a meal at this hour of the night. when he asks just tell him NO and stand your ground. the reason he expects you to do a" WOMANS JOB" is because you do it!!!!! there is not a man on this planet who would get away with this male chauvinistic piggish behavior if he were to date me. i am the polar opposite of submissive. you teach people how to treat u.
    gwen20

    Answer by gwen20 at 11:05 PM on Jul. 12, 2011

  • Yep my husband is the same way...I had to get used to it just because I do not want to tear apart the family. Your new at this and there's alot of adjusting you need to do. Also what need to happen is he needs to do some adjusting as well and you both need to come to an agreement. marriage is about making things work and you do that with changing standards. my husband has gotten better. but he does make the money so I can create a nice home and make good meals. He has his job and I have mine. Either I accept it and realize it could be worse or turn the kids world upside down because I want something else.
    alotleft2do

    Answer by alotleft2do at 11:05 PM on Jul. 12, 2011

  • I think this issue should have been raised prior to marriage and having a baby but not trying to judge but just remind that some things should like this should probably be discussed as preventive measure. His attitude about a woman doing all the cooking & cleaning is archaic. I would just stock on on frozen dinners, order pizza, or stock up on Bertolli's ready made meals. Tell him you're pregnant and tired and if he doesn't want what u can offer then too bad. You def need to have a talk about chores to share. Set up a daily schedule on who agrees to do what and stick to it. Personally, he sounds like a baby and I'd think twice about staying w/him. It's not too late to get an annulment. Maybe move back w/some family for a month to remind him of his choices.
    hellokittykat

    Answer by hellokittykat at 11:07 PM on Jul. 12, 2011

  • Also with 2 babies to take care it is time to make meals and freeze them in microwave safe containers...so when he says he wants food you can toss the container in the microwave..he may fuss but he has to learn to adapt to having kids and you being tired
    alotleft2do

    Answer by alotleft2do at 11:07 PM on Jul. 12, 2011

  • You have to speak up and tell him how you feel-Your pregnant -he suppose to be cooking for you-
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:10 PM on Jul. 12, 2011

  • its called a man. they are all a pain.
    Meghan6391

    Answer by Meghan6391 at 11:14 PM on Jul. 12, 2011

  • Ladies it's hard for me to talk to him, he compares me to his mom and I hate that! I tryto explain to him that I'm not his mom I'm his wife n he tell me " oh well do your fucking job" it is day n night with him. Some days he is really really sweet n other days he is acting out n saying really nasty things to me. How am I able to talk to him? Being a wife is hard with the way he acts as a husband.
    Anonymous

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 11:20 PM on Jul. 12, 2011

  • agreed! go to bed you are 8 months pregnant! you need to rest! you need to be selfish, if you give in he will walk all over you! stand up for what you think is right!
    mama33649

    Answer by mama33649 at 11:26 PM on Jul. 12, 2011

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