My husband has a daughter from a previous relationship who is now grown ( 23 ) ... When we first met she was his princess , but as time went on we seen her less ( she was a teen and more worried about her friends and boyfriends) ...
We live in a small backwoods town where it is 99% white .. I am not saying we have anything against people of different color, but there is ALOT of people who live here that are... so when she introduced us to her boyfriend who was very dark and who we knew nothing else about, we tried to talk her into not getting so serious with him because we knew they could never be together in a normal relationship and live where we live.... plus even if he was white, they were so serious, so soon, we still wouldnt have liked it ( so it wasnt just because of his race) ....
She got upset over us trying to talk to her about it and basically cut us out of her life.
One day a few weeks ago we ran into her at a store, it was wonderful seeing her, she was so grown up and so beautiful.. my husband hugged her and said he had missed her and said he didnt want to miss out on any more of her life especially over some boy she dated in high school...
That is when she said " he wasn't just some boy i dated in high school, he is my husband and the father of my children" .. I think my husband and my mouths both dropped to the floor... we never knew she got married, never knew she had kids... my husband was so heartbroken he missed out on all of this...
We invited her and her family over to meet us and the rest of the family for 4th of July , when her 2 little girls walked in my heart almost popped out of my chest, they are the most beautiful little girls I have ever seen ! They were so well behaved, so smart, just PERFECT ... her husband was also handsome, dressed nicely, polite, and you could see how much love and respect her had for her.... they told us how they got married, they bought a nice house ( 30 mintues away) , and they just have a nice little life together....everything was just so nice..
Until, a relative of my husband made a racial slur and she heard it ( the relative tried to say it so only a few people heard it but so did she) ... tears filled her eyes and she said they had to go...
we have tried so hard to get in contact with her again, and she is ignoring us , she snet me an email saying she feels that we are not ready to appreciate her family right now and that maybe in the future we will.... and that just breaks our hearts !
How can we prove that we dont feel that way, that we love her and her children and we want a relationship with them !!!
Asked by Anonymous at 12:04 AM on Jul. 13, 2011 in Relationships
Answer by Imortlmommy at 12:11 AM on Jul. 13, 2011
IMO,,, the ignorance of the person saying the slur shouldn't upset your relationship with her. She should understand that people are going to have their opinions about her husband and family. But she shouldn't hold that against you. Maybe meet with her somewhere she'd be more comfortable. Good luck
Answer by Danni143 at 12:15 AM on Jul. 13, 2011
Answer by VeronicaTex at 12:16 AM on Jul. 13, 2011
Answer by PartyGalAnne at 12:48 AM on Jul. 13, 2011
Answer by momavanessa at 1:21 AM on Jul. 13, 2011
Answer by Anonymous at 1:48 AM on Jul. 13, 2011
Answer by JackieGirl007 at 2:12 AM on Jul. 13, 2011
Answer by ProudMammaMia at 3:53 AM on Jul. 13, 2011
Answer by Fistandantalus at 7:22 AM on Jul. 13, 2011
Answer by eluc at 9:22 AM on Jul. 13, 2011