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Counting down the days til he's gone :(

My Dh deploys really, really soon. I decorated him the first few pages of a sketchbook (he's an artist) with pics of our family and quotes and things to make him smile while he's away and figure he can use the rest of the pages while he's gone. It's my going away present to him. I'm also making him cinnamon rolls (his fav.) the day he leaves.

I really wish there was something else to do though. This is the first time he's leaving and I'm at a loss for how to send him off properly. Any ideas?


Asked by Anonymous at 5:12 AM on Jul. 13, 2011 in Relationships

This question is closed.
Answers (5)
  • I would ask him. We've been through a lot of deployments over the years, and honestly, each time, it's been different and he's wanted something different for him going and also for when he came home. Something I do before my dh goes is I ask him to make a list of a week's worth of dinners and a couple of days worth of restaurants that he wants before he goes. I cook the meals for him (maybe a restaurant mixed in here and there), and then the last night, we go out. That way, we get that time together without me cooking or having to clean up right before he goes, or leaving the mess and coming home to deal with it right after he goes.

    Also, get a few things to send with him that he can send back - like, a box of cards (birthday, any holiday cards while he's gone - those could be hard for him to find).


    Answer by sailorwifenmom at 6:40 AM on Jul. 13, 2011

  • cont

    Something else that you all can do - though this is not so much for him as for him to do with your kids, depending on how old they are (we started doing this with our kids when they were small and we still do it, even though they're teens). Have Daddy decorate a jar, a tupperware container, or whatever, with pictures of Daddy, Daddy with the kids, that sort of stuff. Then fill the jar with Hershey's kisses and hugs. (You can add more over the length of the deployment, just don't let the kids catch you.) Then, every day that Daddy is gone, they get a hug or kiss from Daddy. It might sound silly, but it really does help.

    Also, for him... This is an ENTIRELY personal thing, and will depend on your own beliefs, how much trust there is in your marriage, etc. Some women do this, some do not. But you could either let him take some "private" pictures, or you could surprise him with some boudoir pictures....

    Answer by sailorwifenmom at 6:45 AM on Jul. 13, 2011

  • Oh - one thought with the pictures - IF you decide to do that, do NOT ever email them to him if it's to a government email or if he's going to be using a government computer to access his private email account. Even if it's his wife, he CAN and WILL get in a LOT of trouble - like busted in rank, loss of pay, loss of computer access, etc, if he gets any "private pictures" sent to him like that.

    Send them with him before he goes, or send them to him printed out, or, if he has his own computer, on a password protected disk, in a care package, sealed in an envelope marked private (they often open boxes in front of friends...)

    I have known LOTS of women over the years that have learned this the hard way, when their husbands got busted because they sent them nude or topless pictures of themselves.... Not to mention that the military IT guys who filter for those now have seen your pictures...

    Answer by sailorwifenmom at 6:48 AM on Jul. 13, 2011

  • I don't know what all they can take with them but I figure just spending as much time as you can with him is what the 2 of you need most! Lot's of love is what's gonna stick with him!


    Answer by anichols1 at 5:46 AM on Jul. 13, 2011

  • We've done parties, family gatherings, out to dinner... make sure everyone gets to phone him or say goodbye in person. They now have computers with webcam, phones and can still write letters over there. I have one friend who's hubby is overseas and their Facebook page is shared. He writes robber, she writes to him. Its so romantic to me and im sure comforting to him.

    Answer by sugamama3 at 6:01 AM on Jul. 13, 2011