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do you ever feel like your just a friend when they need something?

well see i have this friend and we use to hang out all the time . but hear lately she dosent call or come over.. only when she needs or want something.. i mean i dont know what to do ..do i tell her no or just be the friend that i am and do it ?

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 10:08 PM on Dec. 17, 2008 in Relationships

Answers (5)
  • WHOA WHOA! Sounds like me a few yrs back!
    Continue to be the good friend that you are, but careful not to be a doormat. People are pretty smart and they call on those that they know are always AVAILABLE (hint hint lol)! You have a life of your own so therefore be "busy" the next time she needs you IF you feel like things aren't changing. On the other hand if the friendship is worth something to you and worth keeping then mention how your feeling. She's not a mind reader... if the behavior continues then go the alternative route I mentioned!
    Candee1913

    Answer by Candee1913 at 10:30 PM on Dec. 17, 2008

  • If this is someone you really care about, I think you should just say tell her, "Wow, it feels like you only call me when you need something, and that kind of hurts." See how it goes from there. If things continue to feel one-sided (you're a friend to her, but she's not much of a friend to you), and it hurst you, then I suggest you start being unavailable.
    devante9901

    Answer by devante9901 at 10:36 PM on Dec. 17, 2008

  • I get that a lot, especially this time of year. And dh gets it all the time, except he doesn't see it the way I do! I would just tell your friend how you feel about it, like the first poster said. There's a chance she doesn't realize it or she's not doing it intentionally, but if she is, she's not worth the effort, imo. Making yourself unavailable seems like a good idea too.
    mom2XandZ

    Answer by mom2XandZ at 11:01 PM on Dec. 17, 2008

  • I think sometimes when life gets out of hand, we focus so much on our problems that that is ALL we focus on. Let your friend know next time that unfortunately you cannot help her this time but would love to just hang out.
    NightOwlMama

    Answer by NightOwlMama at 11:13 PM on Dec. 17, 2008

  • yep i had friends like that, when i told them i didnt have money or cigarettes, cause really i dont im on a fixed income and barely makin it myself, but they stopped calling me cause i wouldnt help them anymore....
    i would just tell her that you can't help them or dont help them as much and see what happens
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:15 AM on Dec. 18, 2008

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