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Should I say something?

School got canceled all over the state today because we're supposed to get a storm. Around 10 this morning my so's ex-wife shows up with my ss while he was at work. She usually drops him off at around 5 on Friday evenings. I have no problem watching him, but she didn't call and ask first. She's a teacher so she has the day off too and just wanted to run errands. It's not a huge deal, but I thought it was a little rude. I don't work, but I have a 5 month old and PLENTY of housework to get done. It's not like I sit around eating bonbons all day. I just don't want her to make a habit of it.

Answer Question
 
sbastille

Asked by sbastille at 12:24 PM on Dec. 19, 2008 in General Parenting

Level 2 (10 Credits)
Answers (9)
  • I would talk to your hubby but def. say something to this woman. Otherwise she will think that she can do this all the time.
    TheDiva320

    Answer by TheDiva320 at 12:25 PM on Dec. 19, 2008

  • To avoid problems, I would talk to your DH and have him speak to the ex. You don't want to make it an issue to where you have problems seeing you SS at all. Exes are like that sometimes.
    goinginsane1

    Answer by goinginsane1 at 12:27 PM on Dec. 19, 2008

  • Totally rude of her. I don't understand some people. When she picks the child up I would just say "this wasn't a problem for today, but if you need me during the day in the future could you please call and check first because I may be out for the day or have errands myself when I'm not expecting you."
    momofpurebliss

    Answer by momofpurebliss at 12:28 PM on Dec. 19, 2008

  • Talk to her directly. Say something like"I realize I am home and that is why you dropped off ss but next time could you check with me on a day off because I had planned to___" make something simple up(white lie so harmless), very respectfull say"I am in no way angry I just don't wsnt you to mess up your schedual sometime by thinking I am available-I'd feel horrible if I wasn't here or something." Make it seem like you are letting her know to help her out, and maybe she will accept it. I am the "ex wife" and unfortunantly my ds future step mom ihas made a relationship impossible. Good luck and remember be nice-it gets you much farther. Good luck!
    Bearsjen

    Answer by Bearsjen at 12:31 PM on Dec. 19, 2008

  • absolutly talk to her
    Thalie

    Answer by Thalie at 12:37 PM on Dec. 19, 2008

  • I would've been mad as well. You should've told her you had plans already.
    delta27

    Answer by delta27 at 1:09 PM on Dec. 19, 2008

  • I would say something, but nicely since you will still have to deal with her for years to come. Maybe tell her that, while you love to spend time with him, you'd like her to please call to confirm that it will not be a problem (or conflict with your schedule) if she ever needs to drop him off early.
    amy_k_in_pa

    Answer by amy_k_in_pa at 1:31 PM on Dec. 19, 2008

  • I would def. talk to her. Tell her what you said here...you don't mind, but in the future could she please call to make sure you don't have "errands" of your own to run. And as others have said, as long as you're nice about it it shouldn't be an issue.
    micrespo

    Answer by micrespo at 1:57 PM on Dec. 19, 2008

  • That was rude and presumptious...I would not ask him to talk to her..I would tell her myself.
    salexander

    Answer by salexander at 9:35 PM on Dec. 19, 2008

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