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what can i do with my hubby?

hi,i gave birth a month ago,im really tired taking care of the baby by myself ,specially that im not really used to,my problem is not the baby but my hubby who is really messy,he comes home throw his cloths,make a mess,eat and leave eveything ....i know he works hard i understand and that he wants to come home and relax,but i dont ask him to clean i just ask him to be a little organized and help me keep the house clean i want him to when he takes a shower put his dirty cloths in the landry basket....is it too hard?what can i do to explain him this so he can change?thanks ladies

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tigernina

Asked by tigernina at 2:16 PM on Dec. 19, 2008 in Relationships

Level 2 (7 Credits)
Answers (8)
  • I would start small....if you want him to become Mr Clean overnight, he won't do it and will get resentful. So just ask him to do one thing. Like, "honey, I know you work very hard but could you please hang up your towel after your shower." If you think he needs extra incentive, tell him if he does whatever for a week straight you will give him a super blowjob.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:20 PM on Dec. 19, 2008

  • I have the same issue with my husband. Here's the thing. . . you are not going to be able to change him. Trust me, this has been a constant argument for years and he hasn't really gotten much better. As a new mom, I had to let go of having a clean house or even a house that was really picked up. I put everything into perspective and it does still just about kill me but we can't do it all by ourselves. We use one day during the weekend to really clean the house as much as we can. I let him have a couple of rooms that he can get as crappy as he wants during the week. The rest of the house, I just kind of pick up after him because he's not going to do it himself. Men are just like that. They have different standards and they don't notice these things.
    have2travel

    Answer by have2travel at 2:20 PM on Dec. 19, 2008

  • Unfortunately I think most men are this way unless they are neat freaks themselves. I've been married for 5 years and still can't get my husband to pick up his underwear or dirty clothes. I even told him I'm not his mommy and at least he can do is pick up after himself. anyway I don't think there is a right anwser to this problem, but your not alone.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:21 PM on Dec. 19, 2008

  • My ex used to come home and leave a trail of clothes from the front door to the bedroom. I pleaded to him to put them in the hamper. I finally told him: if it doesn't make it to the hamper, it doesn't get washed. 1 week without clean underwear taught him a lesson. Try this strategy with DH and see what happens.
    companygoddess

    Answer by companygoddess at 2:21 PM on Dec. 19, 2008

  • Shit, Id come out and say it to his face like you are not a kid anymore and I am not your mother please pick up after yourself. Tell him you dont have time to clean after him cuz you have a child of your own. Yup id say that.
    aznblond9

    Answer by aznblond9 at 2:23 PM on Dec. 19, 2008

  • Shortlky after we were married many years ago I broke my husbnad of the 'drop my clothes wherever I want' syndrome. I got fed up on day...a laundry day. We only had one car and no washer so I had to take him in then go to the Laundrymat. I decided I was taking the towels off the rack, the clothes in the hampers and NOTHING on the floor. 3 days later he comes in and says 'Honey didn't you do laundry this week" I responded with "Of course I did I washed everything that was in the hampers and clothes basket." He didn't say a word, he was soooooo angry. I just told him he was grown and I had more to do than pick up his dirty socks becuase he couldnt bother to put them in the proper place. He wasn't happy that night..however, he learned to put his clothes in the basket
    GrnEyedGrandma

    Answer by GrnEyedGrandma at 2:24 PM on Dec. 19, 2008

  • I would tell him straight up I am (your babys name) mother, NOT yours, and with having a 1 month old I dont have the time to picK up after you all the time, I know you work hard, but so do I now and a lil help like not leaving your dirty clothes on the floor
    hautemama83

    Answer by hautemama83 at 2:41 PM on Dec. 19, 2008

  • Well I would just move things out of the way if they were bothering me and when he said "honey where is my _? I would say, I dont know WHERE DID YOU PUT IT?
    NightOwlMama

    Answer by NightOwlMama at 4:45 PM on Dec. 19, 2008

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