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i dont know what to do

Hi ladies... i am having so many emotional issues. I know everyone is going to tell me that its because i am pregnant...and i am sure some of that is the cause. But i just feel so inadequate right now, i feel like i am not happy with my husband, im stressed over the baby, i am stressed over the new house we are buying, he has a friend that disrespects me....(he smokes in front of me and in our garage when i have asked him specifically not to and even my husband wont say anything) i am a teacher and that is stressful....OMG....so many things. I cry every night...most days. I cannot help it. I just dont know how to deal with all of this. The only time i am truly happy is when i am by myself or doing something i want to do. SOrry this is so sparatic....but i just am lost and i dont know what to do anymore. UGH...i just need someone to talk to...

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kayteee25

Asked by kayteee25 at 7:57 PM on Dec. 19, 2008 in Relationships

Level 4 (33 Credits)
Answers (7)
  • I've been there and some of it does have to do with your pregnancy but I think some of it has to do with the loss of self fear. I love my DH and my 2 boys very much but there are times when it feels like I'm drowning. I love when I have time to do the things that I want to do...the times I get to identify with self. It'll be okay. You will find a way to get through this.
    micrespo

    Answer by micrespo at 8:02 PM on Dec. 19, 2008

  • Probably most of it is the hormones. You probably ordinarily could handle this. All of these things, the baby, the new house, the friend, the job, they are stressful. Try setting aside some time each day for doing something quiet and peaceful just for yourself. Put your feet up, read, have a nice bubble bath (if your gyn says it's OK), listen to music, walk in the mall, stop at the library, something to remove yourself from feeling stressed. Also practice breathing exercises, breathe in slowly, hold, breathe out slowly and blow away your stress at the same time. When the friend is around you, excuse yourself and leave the area.
    Bmat

    Answer by Bmat at 8:14 PM on Dec. 19, 2008

  • Breath honey.............just breath. You are stressed, hormonal and over sensitive right now. Brnat is right. Take some time for you. She was much nicer with her advice about the smoking friend. I wouldnt just leave the area, I would tell him why your leaving the area and while your explaining that his smoke is hurting your baby I'd be looking my husband straight in the eye.
    mistynights234

    Answer by mistynights234 at 8:22 PM on Dec. 19, 2008

  • i have tried all of your advice...i am still lost. Its pretty bad BUT MUCH APPRECIATED that i have to turn to a computer for someone to talk to. Ive tried talking to my husband....and i would rather talk to a brick wall. Its horrible. i am so afraid that iw ill end up single and without him...UGH!!
    kayteee25

    Answer by kayteee25 at 8:30 PM on Dec. 19, 2008

  • You are not being oversensitive about the second hand smoking thing. If this idiot can't stop lighting up around you your DH should ask him to leave. Print up a list of things that can happen due to second hand smoke and give it to your dh. That' s ridiculous.
    As for the crying, that is probably the pregnancy. I used to cry when we ran out of things I wanted to eat. Uncontrollably. for hours. (when My dear grandma passed on and I wasn't pregnant, I cried for a half an hour. Crying isn't me) Look into pregnancy yoga to help you get through the roller coaster and good luck!
    lovinangels

    Answer by lovinangels at 10:42 PM on Dec. 19, 2008

  • have u said something to his friedn about not smoking,go crazy on his ass then i bet he might not come aroundat all. u have a very good reason for flippin out right not,and imight relive alot of stress if u just let someone have it all
    angelairelan

    Answer by angelairelan at 9:08 AM on Dec. 20, 2008

  • Wow! You have some great answers from these ladies here. I would take the advice & run with it! You are going to be fine honey! I'm sorry that you are feeling so bad right now. I would also pick a journal If your not already doing so. Start writing down your true feelings & don't be afraid to say anything. If this is the way you feel right now, Write them down. I also would write my husband a letter since he's not willing to listen what you are saying right now. Let him know that you need some time space or have a distance from him until he decides to take responsibilities & step up on acknowledging your requests such as "his friends" not smoking. Remember that he married you, Not his friends so you tell those "so called" friends to hit the road if they can't respect your wishes or your self worth!  Until then keep your conversations short with your husband so that he may see what it's like to be ignored.

    onespecialmom

    Answer by onespecialmom at 11:42 AM on Dec. 20, 2008

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