Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

How can i get my 17 month old to listen to me?

He throws himself on the floor and even hits me in the face and even worse it happens everywhere especially the streets!!! i dont want to hit him and its very frustrating. At times i just cry . Help

Answer Question
 
Jas0nz-m0mmY710

Asked by Jas0nz-m0mmY710 at 10:35 PM on Dec. 19, 2008 in Toddlers (1-2)

Level 1 (0 Credits)
Answers (11)
  • we do time out.
    I tell my 17month olds... no sir 3 times
    The 3rd time pick them up. HOLD them in my lap so they cant play and facing away from me.
    After a min is up face them tords me. tell them mama said no you shouldnt _______!!!
    It works for us. Now when I say no sir they listen
    mama2twins07

    Answer by mama2twins07 at 10:38 PM on Dec. 19, 2008

  • I put mine in baby jail when she acts out. (playpen) Just have to tell them no and remove them if you have to.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:38 PM on Dec. 19, 2008

  • I do baby jail and it works. A coupla min. to cool out in the playpen and he's good to go. He's 18 months and does the same things your baby does...but the baby jail works wonders. LOL
    micrespo

    Answer by micrespo at 10:46 PM on Dec. 19, 2008

  • Wow...I'm in the same boat. I think that it will just take time, luck, and patience!
    jacobsmom707

    Answer by jacobsmom707 at 11:14 PM on Dec. 19, 2008

  • Get to the root of the problem. WHAT is wrong? WHY is your baby behaving this way?
    Frustration and boredom are usually the two main culprits.
    How are you dealing with the situation now?

    Personally, I don't agree with time out- it just doesn't work. You spend more time convincing a toddler to sit down than you do actually having them sit there. And I do not believe in crying it out. Your child is already upset, why make them more upset?
    Liyoness

    Answer by Liyoness at 2:52 AM on Dec. 20, 2008

  • When my DD1 was that age, I could attribute it mainly to a) being tired or 2) wanting something, but feeling frustrated that I wouldn't give it.

    What I did for the screaming, was just allow it. When she got violent, I would put her on the floor and say "mommy doesn't like to be hit. Come to me when you're ready for hugs." Of course she'd cry more, but I would constantly offer the hug "are you ready for a hug yet?" No? Okay. Then I wouldn't pick her up. But once she was ready, even if she was still screaming, as long as she wasn't hitting, I would pick her up,
    Liyoness

    Answer by Liyoness at 2:54 AM on Dec. 20, 2008

  • stroke her hair, hug her tight, and tell her how much I love her. And also remind her that I couldn't understand her screaming, she needed to calm down so I could understand her words.

    Once I got to the root of why she was upset, if it was something I wouldn't give in on, I would offer her an alternative choice.

    I don't believe children need to be punished for not being able to express themselves very well. They just need patience and understanding, and to be allowed to work through their emotions.
    Liyoness

    Answer by Liyoness at 2:56 AM on Dec. 20, 2008

  • Now, at 2 1/2 when she throws tantrums, I take her to her bedroom for a time-in. I tell her that screaming and crying tells me that she is tired, so we're going to lay on her bed for a bit until she calms down.. I do the same thing I did a year ago- hug her and hold her and assure her that I love her, only now I tell her she needs to stop screaming for me to do that because I do not like to be screamed at.

    Needless to say, her tantrums are far fewer, and much shorter.. In fact, when she's doing things she shouldn't be (Such as jumping on the furniture),
    Liyoness

    Answer by Liyoness at 2:59 AM on Dec. 20, 2008

  • I say "come on, let's go to your bed", and she'll get up, race ahead of me and insist "I'm going to go first!!!!" and run to the bedroom. I leave her in there, telling her that when she's ready to listen she can come out. It doesn't matter if she enjoys it- the point is, it works. And I don't have to withdraw my love to make it work.
    Liyoness

    Answer by Liyoness at 3:03 AM on Dec. 20, 2008

  • Also- I disagree with simply telling a child "no". No is meaningless. Children are exploring the world and looking for choices. If you give them none, it makes them angry, frustrated, and unable to tell you in any way other than screaming. Saying "no you cannot ___, but you can ____" is MUCH more effective. It gives them the illusion of having a choice, it redirects them from what you don't want them doing/having, and it is worded in a way that they understand - "no" can be so general. They're doing what they're doing/ asking for what they're asking for because they want it, it attracted their attention. So DISTRACT them!
    Liyoness

    Answer by Liyoness at 3:06 AM on Dec. 20, 2008

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.
close Cafemom Join now to connect to other members! Connect with Facebook or Sign Up Using Email

Already Joined? LOG IN