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If you were our parents would you be sad?

Me and my fiance were going to get married in may of 2010 but because of health issues we have been talking about having a courthouse wedding now so I can get his health benefits and then renewing our vows when we orig. planned our wedding and we don't plan on telling anyone about it. If you were our parents would you be sad that you got the fake? (that is if you found out)

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 6:28 AM on Dec. 20, 2008 in Relationships

Answers (14)
  • no i think i would just be happy that you were happy
    jodi205

    Answer by jodi205 at 6:36 AM on Dec. 20, 2008

  • A big wedding is not what makes a happy marriage, and it shouldn't really have anything to do with your parents. If you are happy, they should be happy.
    summerdayz

    Answer by summerdayz at 6:40 AM on Dec. 20, 2008

  • I am sorry for your health issues. Why do you want to keep it a secret. To many families have too many secrets and it is pointless. How old are you and your fiancee? I have a 20 year old and yes if she got married without telling me I would be sad, not because I missed out but because she felt she had to keep that from me. If you don't mind come to my page and leave me a message about what health issues you are having. I might be able to help.
    God bless!
    usanamama

    Answer by usanamama at 6:42 AM on Dec. 20, 2008

  • yes wouldnt u feel like shit if u were left out!!!!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:55 AM on Dec. 20, 2008

  • i understand the problem you guys have. but as a parent i would still be totally upset for not being there with my daughter / son when they get married. Even if you only do that courthouse thing, why not having at least the parents with you. when your kids are getting married that something very special and i wouldnt understand it if my daughter would not have us with her. i would never expect a big party or anything. only to be there with my daughter when she says "yes i do" to the man she loves and makes her happy.
    m.robertson811

    Answer by m.robertson811 at 7:13 AM on Dec. 20, 2008

  • I don't know how old you are, but my advice is.... tell your parents why you want to do it now and talk about it. If you're old enough to sign the courthouse papers, then they can't stop you but they could be there for it and could plan a reception, have some pictures etc. Even if I don't agree with choices my children make, I'd like to be there for the big moments in their lives. You'll be sad later that they weren't there.
    lisa_ann_p

    Answer by lisa_ann_p at 7:15 AM on Dec. 20, 2008

  • I wouldn't lie to them about it. You should just tell them that it is more practical now and maybe invite them to witness it at the courthouse. I bet that would make them JUST as happy as seeing your big wedding. You can still do both, just don't keep them in the dark. I would be very hurt, not mad, just hurt.
    TilmannsGirl

    Answer by TilmannsGirl at 8:01 AM on Dec. 20, 2008

  • Well I wouldnt lie about it. I think thats totally wrong. I think you should be honest with them and tell them what youre plans are. I am sure they will understand. I would be 100% more angry to know my child felt the need to lie to me about something so important. That is one thing that breaks trust and trust is hard to get back if it ever comes back. So yes I would be pissed, because you would have lied to me.
    gemgem

    Answer by gemgem at 8:38 AM on Dec. 20, 2008

  • You can't worry about your parents in this case at all. Do what is best for you. I'd tell them and just move on. You have to find that point in life where you become your own advocate and put your needs and sometimes wants first.

    Teachermom01

    Answer by Teachermom01 at 8:46 AM on Dec. 20, 2008

  • I would tell them about your plans. I don't think it is necessary to keep that from them. When I was stationed overseas I got married and didn't tell my mom until months later. Needless to say she was ever so slightly upset about it. It isn't like she disowned me or anything but it obviously hurt her feelings. I wish I had thought it through a little better BUT I was 19 so quite as smart as I am today. LOL
    cat1622

    Answer by cat1622 at 9:26 AM on Dec. 20, 2008

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