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Question about Custody for my SIL....

Does anyone know if it is normal for a judge to grant 3wks on 3wks off custody for a 2yr old child. The parents live in different states so the little girl would have to travel 750 miles every 3wks. Does anyone else think that this is crazy and not healthy for a 2yr old child? Also does anyone have any advice as to what the mother can do. Can she appeal this? She is very upset with her lawyer, she doesn't feel like her lawyer really even fought very hard for her at court. The lawyer didn't explain that she left because the father has anger problems or anything. She is a mess and im trying to help her get some advice on what to do. Thanks

Answer Question

Asked by princessamber5 at 6:52 PM on Dec. 20, 2008 in General Parenting

Level 1 (3 Credits)
Answers (9)
  • you know they can make someone move i think if the father wants to see the child i think he sould move that is a hard thing for a little child. i think she should go back seek more legal advice she or the child should not have to go though that.

    Answer by Wyattsmom205 at 6:56 PM on Dec. 20, 2008

  • find a different lawyer and go back to court

    Answer by bi-polarmommy at 7:21 PM on Dec. 20, 2008

  • Well we are only getting one side so hard to say. There is always three sides to a story, his, hers and the truth. I don't agree with the parents being in different states. Maybe one of them needs to move back, but if he is doing what a father should be doing I don't see a problem with it.


    Answer by Anonymous at 8:09 PM on Dec. 20, 2008

  • This seems like a strange custody arrangement. What are they supposed to do when the child goes to school in a few years? The mother needs to file for a modification. Traveling 750 to another state every 3 weeks couldn't be in the best interest of the child.

    Answer by PrttyMstng at 9:29 PM on Dec. 20, 2008

  • Anon 6:09

    That's the point he isn't doing what a father should be doing. He was emotionally and verbally abusing her mother in front of her. That's why mom left and went to the state were her family lives in the first place. She was the child's main caregiver when they were together and dad rarely did anything to help take care of the child, it was all put on her. All the child knows is her mother, and she is going to be a nervous wreck when she is taken away from her mom for 3wks. And even if the father was doing his job as a father, how could you possible think that it's ok to drag a 2yr old child around like that from place to place every 3wks. The parents should be the ones doing the traveling to visit in my opinion, and I think it should be dad because he is the one that caused this to all happen in the first place.

    Answer by princessamber5 at 10:53 PM on Dec. 20, 2008

  • Well wich ever parent moved so far away should move closer, and she needs a lawyer that will listen to her and express to the court that his issues, eventually they will go back to court to figure out this issue of were will she go to school, and she needs a lawyer who will push that the child should be there at her house for the school year.

    Answer by sheismyangel at 11:19 PM on Dec. 20, 2008

  • We did it with my son but did it 4wk on 4wk off. Its probably not a great idea especially with such a young child, but sometimes its all we could do. He still flies between us, but he is 8 now so has been doing it 6 yrs. It does stress him sometimes, but I cant move there and the ex cant move back here.
    She can appeal whatever she wants to. And as often as she wants pretty much but it can annoy the courts if she does it a ton.
    Hopefully she can get her appeal. good luck to her

    Answer by AngelicDevil80 at 11:26 PM on Dec. 20, 2008

  • To answer PrttyMstng: Once they reach school age it will fall into who ever doesnt have the physical at the moment will get all school breaks pretty much and on and off holidays usually.
    Sometimes the mother moves to get away from an abusive situation and you cant expect her to go back esp. if theres no family there. If its bad enough theres a chance she could be killed. The courts will more then likely ask the father why he wont move to be closer.

    Answer by AngelicDevil80 at 11:31 PM on Dec. 20, 2008

  • That is absolutley insane, and I dont kno any lawyer in there right mind that would even except that as a stipulation wow crazy i would def get another lawyer and It is so ujnfair that she should even have to go through that at 2 yrs.

    Answer by AariyanaElene at 12:52 AM on Dec. 21, 2008

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