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should i give him another chance?

my baby daddy has put me through hell since we have been together, in and out of jail, a coke problem, lying, cheating on me and hitting me. he swears he will change this time if i give him another chance. i know the obvious answer is no, but i also slept with other people, hit him and lied to him about lots of things. i want us to be a family but i know we both need to change, he has suggested couples as well as individual counseling. if he comes out and proves he has changed, should i give him another chance? ONLY AFTER HE PROVES HE IS DIFFERENT. does he get another chance then, or is the past too much to forgive and forget?

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 12:27 AM on Dec. 22, 2008 in Relationships

Answers (11)
  • You both need to go your separate ways. Sounds like the relationship is explosive when you both are around each other.


    Answer by Southerncharmes at 12:28 AM on Dec. 22, 2008

  • I don't think so. He has repeated those things over and over and no one deserves that. It's time to move on and think about your child and yourself and just let him go.


    Answer by Christine0813 at 12:30 AM on Dec. 22, 2008

  • Two wrongs don't make a right. You seem to be no good for each other. You can love someone from a distance and I think yours is one of those instances where you love and respect each other enough to realize that together you are volatile and allow each other to find happiness elsewhere.

    Answer by micrespo at 12:30 AM on Dec. 22, 2008

  • You both need to be thinking about your baby!!!!
    Look at all the ridiculous things going on when you should be trying to live right and be a positive role model for your baby.

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:33 AM on Dec. 22, 2008

  • so nobody thinks even counseling can help? is it completely hopeless?

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:41 AM on Dec. 22, 2008

  • Hopeless at this point especially with all those things listed. I know it's not what you wanted to hear but you did ask but it's your decision. Just really think about it and your BABY.


    Answer by Christine0813 at 12:44 AM on Dec. 22, 2008

  • my daughter isnt a baby, she is almost 2 and it is her im thinking of, if i didnt have a child with him, i would never consider giving him another chance. i am asking bc i dont know if it is worth being a family or not.

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:02 AM on Dec. 22, 2008

  • yeah its done way too broken to repair. even with you guys getting help. so just dont give him another chance.

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:25 AM on Dec. 22, 2008

  • listen from someone who's in the same situation as you....if YOU think its worth saving and if YOU think the counseling would help and if YOU think hes worth a second chance what YOU feel is the best thing for YOU and your kid...there is NO ONE on here that will have to live with it if it becomes a YOU and you alone need to make this decision...BUT if you need someone to talk to who is where you here! my hubby is in too right now...and he's promising me the moon earth and stars...and IM choosing to live my life with him....i dont know who these ladies are tellin you its beyond not gonna judge you but i will be here to support you...from one MAMA to SISTER to here if you need to talk.....Peace


    Answer by krazi_beautyful at 1:55 AM on Dec. 22, 2008

  • I've been there and done that. Both of you really have to want to change and make things better. It didn't work out between me and my ex husband so I left. He would promise me all these things when he was in jail but when he would get out everything would be fine for a little while then he would just go back to his old ways again. If you really think it's worth it then go for it but if not forget it and go on with your life. There's nothing worse than being in a relationship that's pure hell.

    Answer by TNGirl420 at 2:11 AM on Dec. 22, 2008

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