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If you were the Ex or BM would you think?

That just because your ExDH buys expensive gifts to your kids (his kids too) would you think he is loaded with cash? And would it make you want to take more of him in cs? Even though he is caught up on it. I am the new wife:)

And please I don't want to hear... you knew he had kids when you met him. Just answer my question. This was for the ones that are ready to attack!

 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 3:58 PM on Dec. 22, 2008 in Teens (13-17)

This question is closed.
Answers (10)
  • It would depend. Is this the first time he's buying them expensive gifts? Does he pay his support on time, or does it come late, sometimes skipped, etc? How much is he paying in support? All these things would come into play for me.

    Honestly, my ex is $11,000 behind, so if he showed up with expensive gifts, yes, I would think he had some serious cash, and I absolutely would have his ass back in court. But if he were paying his support each month, on time, and it was a decent amount, and he'd always been buying them expensive gifts, then no, I probably wouldn't.

    In reality, if she wants to take him back to get more, she can. Whether she'll get it or not is another story. And it really doesn't matter what kind of gifts he buys the kids. He could give them old newspaper to read, and she could decide to take him for more. It just depends on whether or not she wants to.
    tropicalmama

    Answer by tropicalmama at 4:03 PM on Dec. 22, 2008

  • No I dont think they can anyway. I know with my ex I take him every 3 years like clockwork unless I know for a fact hes gotten a substantial raise. And no I wouldnt think he was loaded with cash I would think that he was trying to show off and laugh.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:02 PM on Dec. 22, 2008

  • I wouldnt really think anything. My ex went years without paying child support and one year sent over $300 worth of shoes for back to school. That really pissed me off since I thought wow you know he could have paid his child support LOL. In the end though he was brought up on felony fragrant non support and had to pay or go to jail. Now he pays religiously because hes afraid of the big house. He just sent my kids Christmas presents. He sent them $50 each. SOme years he sends $100-$200. I dont really care. I know in the beginning he always over compensated during Christmas which was a huge waste of money imo. What the kids really wanted and needed was someone who wasnt trying to out shine the other parent.
    gemgem

    Answer by gemgem at 4:13 PM on Dec. 22, 2008

  • In my state anyway you can only go for a modification every 3 yrs. doesnt matter if my Ex all of a sudden got a great amount of money, if I had just had it modified I couldnt do anything even if I wanted to. And what is with this "take more of him". Its money to support his children. I always hate it when the Ex & the "new" wife act like he shouldn't be paying to help support his own kids. double standard. (btw, my Ex is NOT remarried & not even dating right now that I know of so that is NOT why I am saying that. just observation)
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:35 PM on Dec. 22, 2008

  • Here's the thing...Child support is just that...CHILD support. If the ex doesn't think she's getting enough $$$, then she can always take him back to court so his income has to be proven. Other than that, since she's no longer married to him, it's none of her business how much money he has. Now if she got alimony...that's another thing altogether!
    companygoddess

    Answer by companygoddess at 4:38 PM on Dec. 22, 2008

  • If he was bad about reporting changes in his income I would question things, but if he was just being a good father and was paying his child support regularly, I wouldn't push the issue.
    kabbot01

    Answer by kabbot01 at 9:47 PM on Dec. 22, 2008

  • that would just tell me that he doesn't know how to spend money wisely or that he feels he has to buy his kids love. i used to think that when my ex did this but he never really had more money then me well maybe a little cause they have 2 incomes and i had one but i was glad cause that way i could spend less and not have to spend so much more money on gifts. they got what they wanted and i let him waste his money on things they would loose or brake.
    melody77

    Answer by melody77 at 10:19 PM on Dec. 22, 2008

  • chances are it would be a hassle and a waste of time if you took him to court only to find out there isn't really more money there. he was just extra broke over the holidays.
    melody77

    Answer by melody77 at 10:20 PM on Dec. 22, 2008

  • annoy 4:25 doesn't it cost $$$$ to take him back every 3yrs for modication. Attorney is about $3000 isn't it? Just to get a few extra $$. Does not add up
    JCRestoredme

    Answer by JCRestoredme at 5:48 PM on Dec. 23, 2008

  • If it were my ex I would think that the world was about to come to an end but if the ex was in my husband's situation I would just think that they guy was trying to buy love that he feels he doesn't have a chance to give emotionally. I would be grateful to get any child support so maybe I'm not the best person to answer this question. To those who say just go to court it's simply not that easy. The goverment has to find legally obtained money in order to collect the support that 's owed. Drug funds don't count.
    t3dragonflies

    Answer by t3dragonflies at 11:30 AM on Dec. 26, 2008