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Any suggestions on how to deal with an almost 3 year old girl with an attitude??!?!?!

Our daughter will be 3 in march and she is definently in the terrible twos and has been. She never listens to anything we say and seems to do things on purpose that she knows she will get yelled at for. I am a sahm so i dont really have her on a schedule. She usually wakes up by 8 30, naps around 1 30 or 2 and bedtime is just whenever she passes out on our bed. We have a 3 month old boy now too and it seems like whenever i go to put her to sleep, he wakes up and i have to take care of him first. We cant figure out how to get her on and keep her on a schedule. She sleeps in our bed on top of it b/c she wont stay in her crib, she crawls out. Toddler bed didnt work, and we are going to get her a twin bed and see if that will keep her in her room. It seems like she is breaking my husband and me apart b/c our only time together is at night and shes in the middle of us.

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Asked by Anonymous at 11:44 PM on Dec. 22, 2008 in Toddlers (1-2)

Answers (9)
  • Punish her! Time out, take away her toys. And lay down the law! You are the parents. If you say it's nap time.. then it's nap time. She might fight it at first... but don't give in for anything. No bribes. No second chances.

    Answer by AmiJanell at 12:19 AM on Dec. 23, 2008

  • It does sound like you need to take control. Time outs are a big source of discipline in our house.. I also occasionally spank. Not full on whipping, just a pop on the butt when they go too far or do something that could seriously harm them. For bedtime the trick they do on super nanny is have the Mom or Dad sit in the room on the floor, every time the child tries to get out of bed they say nothing but lay them back down in bed. This can be done for hours. A few nights of this and most kids figure it out. You don't make eye contact. You don't talk or coo or comfort. You can say "Its bedtime." firmly. It won't hurt a nearly three year old to cry. You could try other alternatives. Get a baby gate for her doorway if you have to. Or a childproof doorknob. Put an air mattress on the floor - whatever it takes.

    Answer by Serafyna at 12:30 AM on Dec. 23, 2008

  • Time to get busy with the spankings and be consistent with them!

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:32 AM on Dec. 23, 2008

  • I very much disagree with the above replies. First, look into a video called "The Happiest Toddler on the Block". It is very helpful. I do NOT believe in spankings (aka: corpal punishment imo!) and I have a very well behavied 16 months old because I use Dr. Harvey Karp's approach to discipline. Check out this video:

    Please PM me if you have any questions. Also, this is another good article to check out:

    Good luck! Please remember that there are more effective ways to raise a polite, happy, and secure child than to spank or yell at them! Toddlers deserve respect just like any other person!


    Answer by ballerina18 at 4:59 AM on Dec. 23, 2008

  • Sounds like my son.LOL. He never listens to me and throws a fit when he doesn't get his own way.I think these ladies gave alot of good idea though.

    Answer by LND at 6:54 AM on Dec. 23, 2008

  • Sounds just like my son! He will be 3 in March also!! He has no problems sleeping in his own room though, he has a big plastic toddler sized Lightning McQueen bed that he just loves, he always get layed down at 8pm with a movie (one that he doesn't care much about so he doesn't try to stay awake to watch it) and then we just expect him to go to sleep about 8:30-9pm. That's always worked for us, it gives him some time to calm down before bed. Oh, and we keep the volume so low he can't hardly hear it. As for the misbehavior, my son only wants to listen to his father but putting her on a schedule will help, and I don't believe in spankings, but standing in the corner looking at a specific spot my fiance put on the wall really works for him. When I ask him if he needs to go to the "trouble spot" he freaks out as if someone were going to spank him, so I don't think he likes it. Which means its a good form of punishment!

    Answer by BeckNAiden06 at 11:45 AM on Dec. 23, 2008

  • I believe in a schedule and discipline. Do not let her walk all over u. CONSISTENCY IS THE KEY. U can't yell at her one time for one thing, then let it go the next time. I do spank, but it is very rare that my 3 yo Daughter needs a spanking. She is testing u and she is winning. And with her little brother around now, she probably is dealing w/ some jealousy issues. do things with just her, let her know she is still special to u as an individual. I would stop the co sleeping ASAP. If u and ur hubby don't have time together, everyone suffers.

    Answer by lionslambs at 11:57 AM on Dec. 23, 2008

  • Maybe you are to easy on her without realizing it. I was that way and now am trying harder bc my son was starting to take advantage of me. What I do is firmly say no to whatever is going on and if it is not listened to count to five if by five no improvement sit in corner and if it is something really bad a light smack on the butt. Im still getting there but have seen alot of improvement.

    Answer by jroseh68 at 3:26 AM on Dec. 24, 2008

  • As far as sleeping in the bed. Some people may not agree with what i do but it works for my son. What I havge done is got him a toodler bed and his own tv with a built in vhs player. He gets to watch his elmo movies if he lays in his bed and sleeps in his room. Or i kinda bribe him sometimes .. i will say go to sleep in your own bed and mommy will make pancakes for breakfast or well can play guitars or sing in morning (he loves music). Works like a charm. Just make sure yo do what you promise they will remember hehe

    Answer by jroseh68 at 3:28 AM on Dec. 24, 2008

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