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Would this be a parenting mistake?

Let's say your kid (any age that is old enough to know better), gets upset and in the heat of the moment breaks his absolute favorite toy/game/dvd/etc (choose whichever works for you). After he realizes what he has done he feels horrible. Of course, you want to teach responsibility, but at the same time your heart is breaking almost as much as his is. Say that normally, he is the best kid ever, never gets into trouble, uses his allowance to help less fortunate kids, gives away his stuff to those that want/need it more than him, etc. You know he has learned a lesson...so would it be horrible to replace the item as a Christmas gift? Or is that being a sucker?

*If you just need more info, my son is 10, and it was his Nintendo DS he broke.

Answer Question
 
sandra1023

Asked by sandra1023 at 12:59 AM on Dec. 23, 2008 in General Parenting

Level 9 (326 Credits)
Answers (26)
  • I would get another one..That's just me though.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:01 AM on Dec. 23, 2008

  • no i think he understands right from wrong from what you described, and i think he may have been just upset and made a mistake.
    Everyone makes mistakes.

    he sounds like a good kid. i would get him one. :)
    KelsoBabeyy

    Answer by KelsoBabeyy at 1:01 AM on Dec. 23, 2008

  • I say get him one and just remind him of his lesson he now learned
    momofpurebliss

    Answer by momofpurebliss at 1:01 AM on Dec. 23, 2008

  • I'm glad that others think that is okay, also. He has never had an issue with getting upset/angry before (obviously, if he had anger problems, I wouldn't just get him another one). This is just so uncharacteristic of him (& I feel as bad as he does, I think). He actually told me he would understand if I wanted to take all of his presents back to the store (I had told him that his DS game that he knew he was getting would have to go back because he now has no DS).
    sandra1023

    Answer by sandra1023 at 1:07 AM on Dec. 23, 2008

  • Not sure I would get it for Christmas but I would eventually replace it if possible but make him wait a bit to let it really sink in.
    My son, who is only 7, has a tendency to take his anger out on his things. I don't think I've ever replaced anything he has broken because he doesn't genuinely seem to care for his things. But there is one thing he has that I guard...his doll, Boomer. He's had this thing since he was a month old and he once got so mad he started throwing it around, trying to pull it's head off, etc. I grabbed it away from him. I was so upset that he would try and hurt his prized possession (he was about 4 or 5 at the time). I just asked him how he could be so mean to Boomer and then didn't let him have the doll back for a few days which really upset him. But it's irreplaceable. It's a Beanie Baby and they don't make them any more.
    justanotherjen

    Answer by justanotherjen at 1:12 AM on Dec. 23, 2008

  • I would make him earn part of the money for the replacement.
    ColleenF30

    Answer by ColleenF30 at 1:43 AM on Dec. 23, 2008

  • What happened to piss him off? If he's normally level headed, it must have been something major...I think I would get him a new one as long as he understands that everyone makes mistakes but that if it should happen again, he will have to come up with the funds to replace it. That will teach him some responsibility. And you won't be giving in to him...this is his second chance, and if he blows it, which he probably won't, well he will also know the consequences, and if it does happen, make sure you don't replace it...make him. And be firm, no matter how much it hurts you to see him hurting...
    chavela_carlita

    Answer by chavela_carlita at 2:24 AM on Dec. 23, 2008

  • If this isn't a normal occurance then I would get him another one.
    sammiesmom2000

    Answer by sammiesmom2000 at 6:54 AM on Dec. 23, 2008

  • No, I would not replace it.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:08 AM on Dec. 23, 2008

  • I would replace it but I'd give it at least 6 mos from the time it was broken. Let it really hit home first.
    babyfat5

    Answer by babyfat5 at 8:21 AM on Dec. 23, 2008

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