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I think he is stepping out on me. How would I go about finding out if he is or no HELP

I think he is cheating on me. he insists on going over to a freinds house whose wife is a stripper she has a lot of stripper friends that are single they all smoke pot together. I have asked time and time again that he not go over there but he iwll not stop. Now he is having a Christmas party at his work tommarow and he dosent want me up there at it. He making arragments to be gone the whole time that I am off on vaccation. I think his friends have talkined him into this other womens arms and out of mine. I need some advice.

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 9:57 AM on Dec. 23, 2008 in Relationships

Answers (13)
  • If he has a cell phone check it. If he erases his messages than go online and check the call log. You will be able to see if there are an excessive amount of texts or calls to a particular number. Then look up who owns the number. If you look at the bill details you should be able to see where he is when he makes calls. Good luck.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:00 AM on Dec. 23, 2008

  • First of all, he made all these choices himself. Friends don't make a grown man do anything he doesn't want to do. Whether or not he is cheating, he doesn't respect you, doesn't respect your wishes. Sounds like he is definitely not interested in being the relationship in anymore if he doesn't want you at the party. And personally, my husband is thrilled about my time off whenever I have it and makes sure to put time with me first. That's just totally not cool. What I have learned is (unless you are just jealous and untrusting in nature) if you feel it's happening, it's happening. And he's not even trying to pretend to be good to you. If you must know, follow him and find out for yourself.
    figaro8895

    Answer by figaro8895 at 10:03 AM on Dec. 23, 2008

  • show up at his work party as a surprise. or when he's at his "friend's" house, show up over there and find out for yourself. or you could always ask him about what's going on. don't let him treat you like this if you are unhappy.
    MaMaLaLa369

    Answer by MaMaLaLa369 at 10:04 AM on Dec. 23, 2008

  • Seriously - how old are the two of you?

    I am sorry but this guy? Geesh - even if he's faithful, he's no bargain.

    Wimsey

    Answer by Wimsey at 10:11 AM on Dec. 23, 2008

  • He sounds very young. Not ready for a real relationship.  Why is't he going on vacation with you? You need to catch him in the act. Go to were ever he is going and find out what he is doing.

    louise2

    Answer by louise2 at 10:19 AM on Dec. 23, 2008

  • Check his phone, it's amazing how careless guys are about their phones. I caught my boyfriend that way, pretended to be him through a text, set up a meeting with his woman on the side and had him there with me. Suprise look who's here, amazing how fast all your questions are answered!
    If you're not married to the skeez ball, then honey, you're better off without him. If you really want to be naughty and know they're smoking pot, call police and let his drugged up butt get arrested. Driving under the influence of anything is illegal.
    Just don't stick around with him, he's bringing you down. Break up with him, get a hot makeover, and have a hot time on your vacation without him.
    lilmommy0416

    Answer by lilmommy0416 at 11:26 AM on Dec. 23, 2008

  • I agree with figaro8895 completely.
    hopelessnance

    Answer by hopelessnance at 11:51 AM on Dec. 23, 2008

  • I think he is cheating on me. - if you really do think this (and are not dealing with general trust issues) then the two of you need to have a real heart to heart. (no arguing, blaming, etc. just talk to him)he insists on going over to a freinds house whose wife is a stripper she has a lot of stripper friends that are single they all smoke pot together.- can you go with him sometimes? how often does he do this? while i agree that this is riske behavior, you cant change him, so if you cant beat him, join him or leave him alone.

    Msunique80

    Answer by Msunique80 at 12:01 PM on Dec. 23, 2008

  • continued- I have asked time and time again that he not go over there but he iwll not stop.- while it is selfish on his part to not respect your wishes, you cannot make him do something he doesnt want to do, you cant be his mother. he has to WANT to stop in order for the change of behavior to be effective. Now he is having a Christmas party at his work tommarow and he dosent want me up there at it.- ask him why. express to him that it would mean alot to you to go with him. I wouldnt do the heart to heart talk before asking him this question because of how close the party is and you might get him defensive.

    Msunique80

    Answer by Msunique80 at 12:02 PM on Dec. 23, 2008

  • continued- He making arragments to be gone the whole time that I am off on vaccation.- while i know this hurts because he is the one you want to spend your time with but apparently he dosent want the same right now, so i suggest setting up some things for you and maybe a friend to do and try to have a good time without him. this will do one of 2 things, he will see you investing in yourself and will want to join in or he wont care less and if thats the case then it is what it is. I think his friends have talkined him into this other womens arms and out of mine.- like other moms have said. his friends cant make him do something, they can be an influence but he ultimately makes that decision for himself.

    Msunique80

    Answer by Msunique80 at 12:04 PM on Dec. 23, 2008

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