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Would it be ok?

my SO's paw paw just died. And they think the funeral will be on friday or saturday. I wanted to go with him but I am pregnant and he said no. He said that he is worried that I will go into labor. I'm 36 weeks. I have been having contractions but nothing bad. I really want to be there for him. I think it might have something to do with the fact that i am pregnant some people think it is wrong to go to a funeral if your pregnant. It is an hour and a half away from were we live. What would you do?

Answer Question
 
edgpag

Asked by edgpag at 1:56 PM on Dec. 23, 2008 in Pregnancy

Level 1 (3 Credits)
Answers (9)
  • IMO - I'd like to be there. Mainly for emotional support for my SO. If you think you can handle it then I'd go. Call your doctor first just to make sure he thinks it's ok for you to travel that far away. Im sorry for your loss. God Bless.
    CourtneyAnn8690

    Answer by CourtneyAnn8690 at 1:58 PM on Dec. 23, 2008

  • If you are already having contractions I would call up your doctor and ask them. Then if he gives you the ok your So can't really argue with you too much about it :)
    lilbit837

    Answer by lilbit837 at 1:58 PM on Dec. 23, 2008

  • It is perfectly fine to go if you are pregnant.
    asholan_07

    Answer by asholan_07 at 1:59 PM on Dec. 23, 2008

  • if he doesnt want you to go then dont - i would just do what he says he feels you should do - he needs emotional stability right now - not extra stress ... tell him that if you do go into labor they will most likely stop it so if he realy wants you to be there you will but that you want to be there for him HOWEVER he feels you should.
    vakatia

    Answer by vakatia at 2:01 PM on Dec. 23, 2008

  • I would probably stay home and respect my SO's wishes. My dds fiance had something similiar happen and her fiance traveled out of state for a funeral. She also wanted to be there for him but his mom ended up explaining why he didnt want her there. Basically he was worried enough for her so close to being in labor & then add grieving a loved one & any potential drama and it was better she stay home.
    gemgem

    Answer by gemgem at 2:01 PM on Dec. 23, 2008

  • You should definitely go. I say this because you want to go so badly, and if you don't you may feel badly about it later. Go. It will give you closure. You don't even have to stay the whole time unless you want to be available for your SO the whole time, or you could stay for a while and then ask the funeral home for a place where you could sit quietly (during the viewing, if there is one.) But go. If it works out that you really can't- your SO's objections are too strong- then think about Paw paw with love while your SO is at the service. ((hugs))
    Bmat

    Answer by Bmat at 2:01 PM on Dec. 23, 2008

  • I'd call the DR, get your prenatal checkup info copied to take with you in case. You are prepared in worse case senario. But also just try to be respectful of your SO's wishes, sometimes guys have to do this stuff on their own, it is hard to understand.
    MommyPeck3

    Answer by MommyPeck3 at 2:06 PM on Dec. 23, 2008

  • Ok, if you've had your 36 week checkup, and your dr didn't say anything about your contractions or anything like that, then i would go ahead and go. its only a few days a way, and the chance of you going into labor is minimal. If you want to go then go. As long as ur dr didn't say " i would prefer you to lay low and take it easy for awhile" then i think your in the green to go ahead
    ashcoyle

    Answer by ashcoyle at 2:13 PM on Dec. 23, 2008

  • i do see how it could be disturbing for others to see you there and pregant because i went through something like that and i still kind of feel guilty till today but if he says no maybe its an issue inside him that is beyond just you being prego. maybe emotional issues... i would like to go though if i was in your situation and feel bad if i was told not to go. maybe talk with him some more and ask more questions on why he believes you shouldnt be there for him and his family at a time like this
    lydiamama

    Answer by lydiamama at 2:51 PM on Dec. 23, 2008

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