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what are you views on taking toddlers to s funeral?

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Asked by Anonymous at 3:19 PM on Dec. 23, 2008 in Religion & Beliefs

Answers (21)
  • You dont. I dont take any of my children to funerals. Ever. It isnt something they need to be at and ecspecially toddlers. They cant understand what is going on and if they get whiny or tired they could get loud which is not appropriate either.

    Answer by gemgem at 3:21 PM on Dec. 23, 2008

  • depends on whos funeral it is. if it would be the toddlers father or mother than yes! definately. because in the future it could be important for them. for what reason ever.

    but other than that. i think a toddler shouldnt be at a funeral.

    Answer by m.robertson811 at 3:21 PM on Dec. 23, 2008

  • I don't see a need for them there at all. I won't take mine until they are mature and old enough to understand it.

    Answer by mrspnut82 at 3:24 PM on Dec. 23, 2008

  • I took my son to one when he was very young. The family lost their teenager and I grew up with all of them. They wanted my son there.. he was about a year old. He was well behaved and I had a plan for exiting if he got bored or restless. There was no casket or open casket due to the type of suicide. I would not and have never taken my children to an open casket funeral. I've been to one in my life, and I don't plan on having them go to any until they are older and insist. (I find them morbid and haunting, personally I would rather remember the person as they were alive..)

    Answer by Serafyna at 3:34 PM on Dec. 23, 2008

  • I took my kids to my grandparents' funerals. The first time they went they were 4 months old and a year old. The next time they went they were almost 2 and 3.

    I think it depends on who's funeral it is and whether they were close to the person.

    Answer by ReneeK3 at 3:36 PM on Dec. 23, 2008

  • I think it depends on the child and the circumstances. If I was taking a baby/toddler to a funeral I would make sure I brought plenty of quiet activities to keep them diverted and would have a plan to exit early if they began to get fussy. I took my 4 month old to my grandfather's funeral- she was ebf'ing so it was hard for me to leave her, though I did find child care for my two year old. I sat on an aisle seat and missed part of the service because she started crying. I would much rather have taken her than to miss my grandfather's funeral because it was important for me to be with my family and to have a chance to say goodbye. There were some other children there too... no one seemed to find it inappropriate.

    Answer by Freela at 3:47 PM on Dec. 23, 2008

  • I have never taken my children to a funeral. I see no need for it at all. They don't understand and yet they have to be sucked into the emotional side of it. not for my kids...

    Answer by mamakirs at 3:52 PM on Dec. 23, 2008

  • I take them. If I'm going my kids are going. They went to their first funeral (grave side) in March 2003 (when their great grandmother died) and then to their first full funeral a month later (when my fil died). They were 2 1/2, 17 months and 4 months and I never once considered not taking them. In fact I think it would have been the ultimate insult to not take them. I almost refused to go to the funeral for my fil because I was having a really hard time dealing with it (I don't like open caskets and it all brought back memories of my mom dying 2 1/2 years earlier...the same way: stroke). After some arguing amongst themselves my husband told me I could stay home but they all insisted the kids go. I ended up going.
    Death is part of life and I refuse to hide it from my children.

    Answer by justanotherjen at 4:04 PM on Dec. 23, 2008

  • If it's family, then I take mine. I have gone to funerals of friends and friends' family members and I usually just go by myself. They have been to open casket viewings as well and understand it's just a body...nothing more.

    Answer by mizkaye at 4:24 PM on Dec. 23, 2008

  • It depends on the child, in my view. Do what is comfortable for your family.

    Answer by Tetona at 4:25 PM on Dec. 23, 2008

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