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The talk?

My dd will be 9 soon and one of the girls in her class is getting pimples and another 11 yr old and 10 yr old we know has started her cycles. I don't want her to be mortified when it happens and if it comes early she needs to be prepared. What age?

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Asked by Angie430 at 9:23 AM on Dec. 24, 2008 in Tweens (9-12)

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Answers (12)
  • Now! 2 of my 3 girls got thier cycles at 9.
    She is probably bursting to ask questions!

    Answer by KimPepperoni at 9:44 AM on Dec. 24, 2008

  • I separated the puberty talk and the sex talk for my daughter. Nine is a pretty safe age to have the puberty talk. Then we had the sex talk when my daughter turned eleven.

    Answer by sillyt at 9:52 AM on Dec. 24, 2008

  • I agree, start working in to the subject now. Ask her if she has questions and answer what she asks. Keep it open and frank. It is a natural aspect of life, and she needs to know what it is and how to protect herself from conceiving and from STD's so that she isn't talked in to something that is not in her best interests by someone who just wants to take advantage of her.

    Answer by Bmat at 9:55 AM on Dec. 24, 2008

  • I told my dd at 9. Girls get their cycles earlier because of the hormones in the milk & meat we buy so its becoming standard for most to get them around 10-11 yrs old. Just tell her the basics about the cycle, hair, pimpls and hormones. Thats what I did. Then around 11 we had the sex talk LOL.

    Answer by gemgem at 10:02 AM on Dec. 24, 2008

  • Before she gets there herself. My girls were given that talk the summer before sixth grade. Both were eleven but your daughter may need it earlier. If you tell her before she hears it from her peers, she will have accurate information and know she can come to you for the truth. She may think it's yucky but when she needs the information, she will have it. Use this last few years of being so influential to inform and educate. After it passes, it is much harder to get a captive audience. A good Christian resource is Passport to Purity if you are looking for one and that would meet your needs.

    Answer by happi-ladi at 10:05 AM on Dec. 24, 2008

  • Thanks ladies, she already askes sex questions and she knows about the egg and the sperm just not the technicals of how the two meat besides durring sex. The hair ,puberty ,cycle thing I am having more trouble with than the sex questions but they are just as important.

    Answer by Angie430 at 11:21 AM on Dec. 24, 2008

  • Hi..I am not sure how you feel about religion..but I implemented it into this part of my kids lives. I found a christian bookstore and they had books for different ages. The first set I purchased was from 3-5 yrs old. The next set 6-8, 9-12, 13-15, ect...they are really great at explaining certain things to children at different levels and stages in their lives, but in a christian atmosphere/environment. My daughter is now 10 and she knows all about her body and how it changes thanks to these books I read to them. They still come to me with questions and I answer them very honestly but don't offer them anymore then they ask for. I hope this has helped. Also they will have puberty education in school...they did it here in the fourth grade. but my kids are already well informed. Merry xmas

    Answer by Sen36 at 12:10 PM on Dec. 24, 2008

  • my kids didnt have just one talk, they get several, like when they see my tampons and ask what they're for, or when they ask "where do babies come from", i think its easier to break it down to five minute talks for every question, that way no one is uncomfortable with "The Talk", it just flows with life

    Answer by bi-polarmommy at 1:20 PM on Dec. 24, 2008

  • I believe the books Sen36 is talking about are the ones by Stan and Brenna Jones. They are GREAT! I talked with my DD just before her 10th bd. She will be 11 in late February. She's ready intellectually. Now, we just have to wait for the physical readiness.

    Answer by plclemo at 11:40 PM on Dec. 24, 2008

  • I talked to my girls(9) a few months ago about hair,breasts, and cycles. I felt that I needed to tell them before it happened so that they wouldn't be scarred. As for the "sex" talk, I haven't done that yet, although they do know that it takes a man and a woman to make a baby, they just don't know the act.

    Answer by mom2twingirl797 at 1:23 AM on Dec. 25, 2008

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