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who has a child on drugs and how did you cope with it

I have a daughter addicted to pain pills and she has a baby. This has been on going for about 10 years and I dont know what else to do I have talked till Im blue in the face . She has been in treatment once but needs to go back. Im afraid for her and the baby. We have grown so for apart. I need advice. Or maybe I need to hear from someone who understands what Im going through.Help please

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Asked by boxgirl at 9:46 PM on Dec. 24, 2008 in Adult Children (18+)

Level 1 (0 Credits)
Answers (12)
  • I have never been in that situation but in other issues, I know that sometimes it is best for an outsider to tell her child the wrongs they are doing. Most of the time, I know my "voice of experience" falls of deaf ears. good luck!

    Answer by Ibelucky1 at 10:06 PM on Dec. 24, 2008

  • I have a son but agree with the poster above. THey listen to others much more than they do us!

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:39 PM on Dec. 24, 2008

  • you cnt force someone to get their act together.... and i agree with the women above about they listen better to others... but honestly... in addiction it doesnt matter wat anyone tells us... she will get clean and get her act together when she hits rock bottom... which is either jails. institutions or death.... sad to day but true.... i myself am in recovery and have been clean for 18months... and no matter what neone told me i did wat i wanted to do cause i couldnt let go.....drugs were the love of my life.... you need to be there for ur grandchild and thats all you can do.... wen ur daughter is willing or backed into a corner of desperation... she will get her shit together... [[con..]]

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:01 AM on Dec. 25, 2008

  • [[con..]] has she attended meetings outside of treatment centers??? if u wanna see wat meetings are in your area you can go to {{ }} and type in ur zip code and get meetings around ur area... offer to take or or watch her child while she goes..... its all up to her tho... she will learn.... when she loses everything and is left with nothing... she will be willling... rock bottom is a bitch but sometimes it takes years to get there... evrything wil work out.... just have faith and let go and let god deal wit it....

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:04 AM on Dec. 25, 2008

  • I don't have a son in this situation but I do have a brother in it. I have learned that as hard as it is you have to let go and let God. We tried in every way we knew how to support him in his treatment and only she will know when enough is enough. You just have to believe that she will realize that what she is doing is wrong and come to her senses. I wish you the best of luck.

    Answer by micrespo at 12:32 AM on Dec. 25, 2008

  • group hug


    Answer by Wimsey at 4:12 AM on Dec. 25, 2008

  • Is she in pain though? I have been on pain pills since my girls were born almost 2 years ago. I take too many pain pills some days and most would say that I am an addict but I do need them for the pain. I get prescriptions. Is she only buying them off the street? How many is she taking a day?

    Answer by jackiec7707 at 5:19 PM on Dec. 25, 2008

  • She has back problems. The pills are prescribed but she does take more than she is supposed to. Im not sure how many she takes but some days she doesnt even know what day or time it is. She has told so many lies in her life time I dont know what to believe anymore. She will tell one lie to cover up another. I always catch her in these lies and she will deny over and over again. Im at my witts end. Our family has bent over backwards to get her help but nothing works. Now my son who is 19 wont have anything to do with her. He is tired of all her lies and let downs. All we want is the best for her but seems like all we do is for nothing.

    Answer by boxgirl at 1:19 PM on Dec. 26, 2008

  • I am not coping I am a wreck. a big mess full of anxiety.

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:36 PM on Dec. 28, 2008

  • Your son is the one on the right track!!!! Look at an intervention with some serious consequences like the loss of her child. Her using endangers the child and when family steps in to take care of the child, you just enable her more---you need to get authorities involved to protect the child. Don't downplay it because it is a legal drug. A drug is a drug. If she were using an illegal drug, you might look at it differently. I urge you to get in touch with a GOOD treatment program and see what they have for professional interventionists. The family HAS to stop enabling.
    My sil "needed" pills to cope with her "pain". But the pain "endured" so she could get more drugs.

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:59 AM on Dec. 29, 2008

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