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Has anyone had to deal W/DCF?

My sister and her kids has been staying w/me and my family. We are arguing and the police were called. They didnt care what had happened...the took our kids names and are gonna call DCF. My sister moved out. But now what should I expect? I called the police "thinking" they were gonna help. But they say ur not allowed to aruging n yell in front of ure kids. I called the police cuz, she kept following me, yelling and knocking over stuff. She also called my daughter names. Any advice?

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 9:17 PM on Dec. 25, 2008 in Just for Fun

Answers (11)
  • Just relax first of all. It sounds as if you didn't do anything wrong - so don't act guilty. Be honest if they do contact you. First and foremost!! DO NOT ALLOW THEM INTO YOUR HOME!! This gives them the opportunity to "look for other problem issues". I would tell them "I would be happy to meet with you - when would you like me to come in to your office?" If your kids are school age, make sure that if they attend public or private school that your child(ren) know that they MUST ASK for a parent to be present if they want to talk to them at school. The child has to ask for this and most kids don't know to ask. Otherwise, the school DOES NOT have to even tell you they came to see your child. GL and feel free to PM me.
    Babylove76

    Answer by Babylove76 at 9:30 PM on Dec. 25, 2008

  • Thank you!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:43 PM on Dec. 25, 2008

  • Relax is good advice... the police might have called but they are not just going to walk in and take your kids without checking things out and talking to you and your kids first. I mean lets be honest... unless things are bad... they got a lot of other kids that they need to take care of... so they are not going to say hey you have a couple dirty dishes in your sink and your kid has a little stain on their shirt so we are taking them. Its gonna have to be a little worse then that. If you don't deal with the police often I wouldn't worry about it and just explain that you had called the police because of your sisters behavior infront of your children. You did the right thing.
    dtetz

    Answer by dtetz at 10:22 PM on Dec. 25, 2008

  • My DH's ex called on us for all sorts of things. I am on a first name basis with all of the workers in my area. One of them was even at my baby shower. I mean she called about horrible things in an attempt to get custody of my step-daughters. She said we were making meth, blowing pot smoke in the girls' faces to make them sleep, chaining them to their beds, denying them food for days at a time, horrible, horrible things.

    We always let them in. Our house is not perfect, but they're not going to do a white glove inspection. They will make sure that it is safe, there is food in the kitchen, and clothes for the kids to wear. No porn, drugs or weapons laying around, that sort of thing. It's really no big deal if you're innocent. Honestly I disagree with BabyLove. Denying them only makes you look guilty. You have nothing to hide and doing those things makes it look like you do.
    SamanthaAgain

    Answer by SamanthaAgain at 10:30 PM on Dec. 25, 2008

  • Sam: I totally agree with you - but I "feel" them out first by being cautious. Depending on their caseload and other complaints, and WHO complains.....my Dr.'s office called them on me b/c I refused to formula feed my youngest DD when she was 6 mos old. She weighed 14 lbs, but to them she should have been 18-20. So, they "reported" me as not feeding my child. BS
    Babylove76

    Answer by Babylove76 at 10:52 PM on Dec. 25, 2008

  • OMG then baby what did you feed her...

    lemme get this right you took away her formula at 6 months because she was chunky?

    OKAY!?? ....Hmmm alright ..nothing to say there but whatever.

    I dont think they will do anything they have at least 24 hours to investigate!
    tell them the truth of what happend!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:28 AM on Dec. 26, 2008

  • Best advice is...you do NOT have to let them in your house! EVEN IF THE COPS COME WITH THEM you do NOT have to let them in with out a search warrant. Which is a pain in the ass to get and they prob won't bother. It is not illegal to argue in front of your kids! Unwise...maybe but not illegal.
    the1youluv2hate

    Answer by the1youluv2hate at 2:03 AM on Dec. 26, 2008

  • They will probably do nothing, especially because your sister moved out. It's true they can remove kids if there is a lot of yelling and fighting in the home. But this was the first call and she moved out. for a removal, there needs to be a ton. Several complaints or something violent. Relax, you will be fine.
    tomib

    Answer by tomib at 2:26 AM on Dec. 26, 2008

  • Anon--I would guess that Babylove was breastfeeding and so she did not want to also feed formula . . . she was not starving her child! And, as other pps said . . . it is NOT illegal to argue in front of children . . you said your sister was kind of exhibiting violence, but even still, it was not directed at the children, right? Either way, it's not wise, but certainly not illegal. Do what you feel is best.
    BridgetC140

    Answer by BridgetC140 at 5:04 AM on Dec. 26, 2008

  • Get your home in order and make every effort to take care of your kids emotionally and physically. You will get an ititial vist and then follow up visits if deemed necessary, until they close the case. If your children are well cared for, it will not be a problem, just an inconvenience and stressor until it's over. They may make recommendations and you will have to comply. Listen, acknowledge the help and use it as a learning opportunity. I am thinking the lesson is not to take in friends or relatives who aren't in control of themselves. Good luck to you.
    happi-ladi

    Answer by happi-ladi at 8:36 AM on Dec. 26, 2008

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