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How do you get a new friend to back off?

I know this probably sounds terrible of me, but I have a newer friend I've hung out with for awhile now and we have fun together, but she really is starting to be over the top clingy. She now calls me non-stop, sends super long e-mails, always wants to hang out, have our kids do Everything together, offers constant advice when I don't ask, and has this notion that our kids, our SO's and ourselves will all be best friends. I'm all about having friends, but it's getting to be way too much. I'm not looking for a new soul mate!! What is a non-bitchy way to get her to stop being all Single White Female??

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Asked by Anonymous at 11:16 AM on Dec. 26, 2008 in Relationships

Answers (3)
  • This sounds terrible, but don't answer the phone or her emails. If she comes over don't answer the door. She'll get the message.

    But then call her and say you've been super busy with the family and we should make plans to do something at a later date.

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:19 AM on Dec. 26, 2008

  • I found myself to be like this to one of my friends in the past and it was simply because I had no life. I really didnt have any other friends so when I had a new one I clung to them. Sometimes its a sign of unhappiness or wanting to fill a void. If you stop answering the calls and etc, she will eventually stop. It may be awhile but she will stop. Its not much you can say to her about it without her getting offended so I would just try to back back slowly.

    Answer by VaDivaMom at 11:26 AM on Dec. 26, 2008

  • I think you need to be honest with her but in a gentle way. Tell her you enjoy her company and you look forward to getting to know her...but not all at once. Tell her you would like your friendship (and that of your SO's) to unfold naturally. And then invite her to do something just the two of you to prove it.

    Answer by companygoddess at 11:55 AM on Dec. 26, 2008

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